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Cause of death - Waiting for the response from HR
HR - Why do we hire you.
Me -
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…re-orged into something I never signed up for. The new structure was chaotic and eventually the whole team was laid off.
Episode 3:
Landed a new internal role I genuinely enjoyed with a much bigger scope (but the same pay). With my older child in preschool, I finally felt like my career was regaining momentum.
My manager promised a promotion path and had me managing six people at my level — without any pay increase.
Then I got pregnant with my second. I pushed hard to secure the promotion before leave, finished all documents and sponsorship, and left feeling hopeful.
During my maternity leave, my entire team was given to another leader — at the level I was supposed to be promoted into — who had previously said she’d support my case. When the promotion cycle happened, I was told it didn’t go through. The odd reason: leadership felt I “graduated from MBA too recently,” even though peers at that level don’t even have MBA…
Episode 4:
Now I’m preparing to return to work from maternity leave and facing the likelihood that instead of being promoted into the role I already functionally held, I will be reporting to the new leader who has been managing the team I built from scratch…feel like a huge step back.
When new moms ask me whether motherhood will hurt their careers, I usually reassure them that the impact is temporary. But many studies show the motherhood penalty can be long-lasting. Is there any real hope here?
Women’s careers often take off in their 50s or later, after the kids are older.
https://hermoney.com/invest/financial-planning/5-iconic-women-whose-careers-took-off-after-50/
Ask yourself:
What have your and your family gained with each career pause/shift?
What do you want your parenting experience to be? What are you willing to outsource?
What will you care about most when you’re 80?
Your kids have huge potential to affect your happiness and wellbeing across your lifetime. You won’t regret investing your time to raise them well and according to your values. They are only little for a short period over a lifetime.
Talk to women who are through it all — in their 60s, 70s, and 80s and ask what trade-offs they made, what mattered most to them, and what they would do differently.
The young kids stage is tough, but the kids don’t want your money. They want and need your time. Find a role that works for now and play the long game. When your peers are burning out, you’ll be ready for the 2nd act with energy.
Maybe I should have said that I can related to OP’s experience. I only felt my gender in the workplace after I had kids. And really it’s because I had to take time off for mat leave and had a whole other set of responsibilities to juggle. But when I was in it, I had to decide what I could control and what was most important to me. So, I decided to create my own career path that looks less traditional and find ways to support other women in their journeys. I just think about how far women in the work place have come and am grateful this is my time in history. And — I still want to make it easier for my kids when they hit this phase of life.