How early did you start looking for child care when pregnant? Also for those that work from home a few days of the week were you able to save money and keep up with the baby while working remote? Not big law salary and husband also is gone the whole day at work..

I worked hybrid when my kids were babies without childcare on the days I was home and I would not recommend it. It was probably the most miserable time of my life. My oldest was a pretty reliable napper so that was more manageable but my youngest was more unpredictable. Every minute I was with my kids, I was on edge that I should be working and every minute I was working I felt on edge that I should be with my kids. I had zero time to take care of myself because I was always trying to make up time from having to toggle between two competing priorities. I barely felt human. Now both my kids are school age and we have after school care - it’s so much better. The quantity of time is less but the quality is 100x better because I can be fully present when I’m with them. If you can afford full time care, do it.

As soon as I found out I was pregnant. Get on waiting lists. Multiple. Even if you don’t think you will need them. I was getting off of waiting lists a year and a half after she was born. Better to have too many options than no options.

I am planning out my pregnancy, and ChatGPT has been a good tool for creating a timeline/to do list including on the child care hiring process. I recommend playing with it if you haven’t already.

Depends on what type of childcare you mean. If you’re interested in daycare/ preschools, I’d get on a waitlist immediately. If nanny, probably 2 months beforehand but doesn’t hurt to casually ask around before then.

Get on waiting lists early in pregnancy for daycare/preschool. If looking for a nanny, you can hold off until 1-2 months out.

Not exactly sure about what you’re asking in your second question but I’d advise you not to work on your leave, for your and your family’s sake; and (2) if you’re considering wfh without childcare I think that’s a terrible idea haha! I wfh most days and have since my mat leave ended in September and I have a full time nanny and could not in any way get my work done without her. I also would inevitably be plopping my kid behind a screen at some point which is unfair to him. Babies (even chill ones) require more direct attention than you may realize.

I live in LA.

When I got pregnant with my first I looked into waitlists and all of the big daycares in and near downtown had an 18-month or more waitlist. Some were over 2 years. By the time baby arrived it was clear there would not be space at those facilities by the time I needed to go back to work.

Nannies didn't pan out for us and ultimately we found an in-home daycare that's been perfect for us. 3 kids and 9 years later and I've never once wondered if we made a bad choice. My kids were in an environment where they were safe, loved, nurtured and able to engage with other kids.

My older two are school age and though they both were in this daycare full time until 4 and then hybrid between daycare and school thereafter, there is no gap in their intellect compared to their peers who came from other environments.

It is stressful looking, but don't let it consume you. We didn't find this option until first baby was almost 3 months old.

I would at least have a mother’s helper come. If your baby is super easy you may be able to keep up with work somewhat. It is easier before they’re mobile and when they mostly just want to cuddle and eat. Once they start moving and getting more interested in the world you really need help, they get bored and unhappy if they’re basically alone at home all day (and they will feel alone if you aren’t interacting with them because you’re focusing on work)

Do not try to work from home without child care. It’s not fair to you or the baby. But you could do a part time nanny, depending on your schedule and flexibility.

Nanny is best under age 2. But you need playgroups, MyGym, library story times, etc. (There are tons of free options for socialization.). Daycare for infants is gut-wrenching and a last resort. You really want the baby home to nurse, nap at home, keep from getting sick constantly, eat freshly prepared home, and be with you periodically during the day.

Part time school age 2ish until kindergarten. Co-ops are very cheap and your nanny could be the cooper.

Expect to spend an insane amount of money on child care/lost wages if you go part time/a good preschool. Go into debt if you have to. This stage of development is too critical to cut corners. Babies die in poor quality daycares (I see cases all the time, including at very expensive ones).

Definitely don’t plan to care for your child while working unless you truly have no other choice. I’ve done it for brief stints out of necessity (daycare closure + work emergencies) and it’s impossible to do both well at the same time. I’m saying this as someone whose LO was sleeping completely through the night at 3 months, very reliable napper on a schedule, and good eater. I had a daycare list before we started TTC (large city with long wait lists) and secured LO’s spot in the first trimester.

The day my pregnancy was confirmed by my doctor lol signed up for wait lists at 20 weeks.

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I find it difficult to work and care for the next. My kids don’t go to daycare but I have someone watch them during the day while I work.

It depends on your area but I’d get on the list as early as possible.

Is it possible to WFH with a baby/toddler? Yes. But it is also miserable, and that’s coming from someone who generally enjoys working and parenting. Combining them is kind of a nightmare. It’s possible for emergencies, like sick days, but it’s not super sustainable, especially if you have meetings, hearings, etc. scheduled at certain times. My toddler will play independently just fine but as soon as I have to get in a Zoom call she becomes the neediest child to ever exist 😂

To your question about working with a baby home, that's a big nope! For a multitude of reasons that truly won't make sense until baby is here, it just isn't an ideal or long-term option, but a fine one on for a short period when needed (baby is sick, etc.).

There’s no way to care for a baby and to get any work done. If it’s an option, I would get childcare for those days.

Something I haven’t seen mentioned is Au Pair. I just renewed mine for her second year and she has been with us since my baby was 4 months old. Super helpful and cheaper than a nanny. Probably need to sign with an agency and start looking about 4 months before the start date.

I’m happy to provide a referral to EurAuPair, which is the agency I’ve used.

Immediately started looking. I would not be able to watch a baby while billing hours. Maybe if it’s flat fee.