I just found out I’m pregnant. I’m very excited, but a part of me is so overwhelmed. It’s hard to focus at work knowing that my entire life is about to change & I already feel like shit lol. What would you say to a mid-level associate who is newly pregnant? What can I do to make this more tolerable as it progresses? *plz no comments telling me how much worse it will get, or “just wait” - that is the root of my anxiety.

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I hated being pregnant, but there IS an end date haha. And the payoff is worth it! The only advice you need is go easy on yourself because trying to do this job while also growing a human being is beyond impossible. But again, 9 months is a short time in the grand scheme of your entire legal career, so just take it day by day, rest when your body needs and it and try to get as much done as you can when you have the energy. But take care of your mental and physical health number one.

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Thank you!!!!

I would add to be kind to yourself and give yourself grace. I’m assuming this is your first, so you’ve never known your pregnant self (she is a different version of you than before). You’ve also not yet met the version of yourself with a newborn (she is also a different version of you than before). Pregnancy and motherhood fundamentally changes you, and that’s okay! I had lots of expectations for myself before being pregnant and becoming a mom. I wanted to “have it all” but I had no idea that the version of “having it all” that I pictured before having kids is a 180 from post-kids. And, the United States and corporate America isn’t the most mom and pregnancy friendly environment. Start building a community of support, whatever that looks like for you. This season won’t last forever, but you deserve to be supported and loved through it. Wishing you all the best!

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Thank you so much!!!! And yes - this is my first!!

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hopefully you can work remote some. The first trimester was the toughest for me with fatigue. I actually felt pretty great in the second trimester! wfh was so helpful for scheduling midday “meeting” naps to make it through the day — especially since caffeine isnt great for pregnancy. congratulations! Being a mom is the best.

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My firm is super in-office culture and I’m nervous about that for sure. I believe they have allowed remote work as an accommodation for pregnant women in the past though!

You never really know when you’re going to give birth (I did early at 35 weeks) so during your second trimester, start preparing whatever you need to hand off your cases when the time comes and update it until that time does come. I was super anxious about the birth itself, so my husband and I took a birthing class at the hospital, which was super helpful. Keep crackers and sour hard candies with you all the time and keep something in your stomach to ward off motion sickness. Be patient with yourself - it’s hard work growing person and it’s ok if you’re not on the top of your game at work right now. Just take it one day at a time. Congrats and you got this!

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Thank you so much!!! I love how practical this advice is. I’m an anxious girlie too so I will def look into some classes!

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Congratulations!! Pregnancy can be a really tough time but as others said, it has a definite end date. I was also struggling because I was sick the entire time and so tired/sleepy/miserable lol Sleeps as much as you can and go easy on yourself. Your body is completely transforming itself to host and grow a new human—that is no easy feat and you need to prioritize yourself/your health. That means eating well however you can. I lived off ramen and crackers when I was nauseous for months and the a rotation of local/online ordered prepped meals like Factor. Not having to cook (which made my nausea worse) and not having to think about what I’m eating (ordering meals already prepped) was a huge help. I could focus on sleep and walking (when I felt human again). I also increased the amount of visits my house cleaner did (to weekly instead of monthly). My husband and I budgeted for this because I had an inkling I’d not love being pregnant… But I’m 8mpp now and my baby was worth every sick minute of my miserable pregnancy lol

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Good luck! It was 100% worth it and even though I know we know it’s worth it during pregnancy, I was still constantly complaining that it sucked having to do it, so I feel you. And now I’m already planning the second and last baby because apparently I’m a masochist 😆

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Two things: Touch and Glamor! Every week do something luxurious for yourself that involves touch: mani, pedi, massage, facial. This will be a relaxation time, help you release stress & rest. It doesn’t need to be at a fancy spa, you can go to your local strip mall and have one or more of these things done at an economical price. Then at least once per month, commit to something glamorous: dress up dinner, photographing yourself/or have someone photograph you in a picturesque locale, theater, high tea, staycation, etc. Doing these things will remind you that you’re worth it because you are embarking on something amazing, it can help keep you centered and give you something to look forward to to help you take away from the work grind. Congratulations!

I love this!!!! Thank you!!

I am only a paralegal, but one of my attorneys, an associate newly admitted, just gave birth and was on maternity leave. She worked remotely most of the time and did video conferences, and I mailed her her things if she needed any binders, etc. After maternity leave, she comes in whenever or hybrid, but she is a heavy hitter for an associate, one of my busiest out of the 7 I work with. I think you will do great I am not sure how good of a firm you work for but our firm is very very understanding.

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