I’m looking for some advice- I feel like my team doesn’t respect or listen to me and will constantly challenge me. I stepped into a managerial position from an HR Generalist. I do have more knowledge in HR(7yrs) and with the company(5yrs). Since stepping into this position, one team member in particular who has been in HR for one year, is constantly pushing back on tasks assigned. She believes that her admin duties..Continued in comments..

Put her on PIP after talking to her about her ways you don’t approve of. Insubordination is a performance problem.

Inability or or refusal to follow instructions. It’s either insubordination or poor performance due to misunderstanding or miscommunication. Either way, it’s something that needs to be addressed and managed. And documented. Whether you call it coaching or discipline, that behavior needs to change.

Don’t let the tail wag the dog.

UGH! What a difficult situation to be in.... for real. I empathize. Ultimately... after all my experience with both compliant and non compliant employees, I lean on ... you CANNOT tolerate a poor heart posture... b/c performance can be trained but... a heart posture is up to the individual. I feel for those in large org roles that have a wholllllllllllllle process they need to run through to change lanes on employees b/c that just drags EVERYONE through the dirt on their way out. I know my state laws and at-will to me... means AT-WILL. If you don't live up, you get every opportunity and due diligence and coaching WILL be given, but if I don't see improvement... you're gone b/c it jeopardizes not only my sanity but sanity of my high producing employees that I truly value and will NOT put in compromising situation (of which includes subjecting them to negative value-add employee).
It's tough... and it costs a little unemployment... a little... but well worth it over the added stress and angst to my current employees.

I agree with those saying DO NOT tolerate this behavior. If you can train it away... do it... but .... ultimately... in my opinion and experience... it's a heart posture... that will not change. People either shape up or need to ship out. Some won't leave unless forced. Those that stay will respect you more, work harder and be more devoted with a higher level of buy-in, ALSO b/c you choose to keep them and they KNOW if you dont' want them they won't be there. NOT cut-throat... just ... no nonsense.

My team is the BEST on the planet b/c they know I acknowledge and appreciate them, I will step in and help when needed (just as you said you like to support) but they also know they are valued to the point that I will not tolerate a toxic team member that is not positively contributing. They know that I have their back and I will give someone the benefit of the doubt, I will allow them to get better and provide them the tools and resources necessary to do so, I will provide coaching and time... but what I will not do is allow continued negative impact to my team whether that is performance or behavior. & THAT is why my BEST players will never leave.

You have to be very black and white about this. Don’t be friendly, but don’t be rude. Just be factual. Document the process and every time it is not followed, copy and paste it in an email to them. If they cannot follow the appropriate process, ask what the challenge is. Whatever the response, remind them it is their responsibility per the process you have outlined. If they do not complete a task, let them fail. And if they continue to fail, put them on a PIP and let them see themselves out.

.. and lower level items should go to me and is changing processes behind my back. I handle much higher level items that I don’t believe they’re ready for. I have no problem assisting them if they’re at bandwidth or training and knowledge sharing (I genuinely enjoy helping my team succeed). Unfortunately, the processes and knowledge sharing coming from their end isn’t accurate and I’m constantly having to correct/re-train. How can I go about them seeing me as a leader? I try to be friendly but also firm where appropriate. It’s taking up a lot of my time to retrain and talk to them regarding basic procedure.

Thank you, everyone!

I have sent them SOPs multiple times and have walked through the process with them a few more. When I ask what the challenge is or if it’s a miscommunication thereafter, I’m told “I thought it was better this way” or “I know how to do it” even though they’re demonstrating they don’t. I’m all ears if someone believes there’s a more efficient way of doing a task but it’s becoming a game of telephone and missing key components in the process itself. They don’t come to me or speak up if they having trouble. It’s a very “I’m not listening to you - I believe I’m more knowledgeable and don’t respect your opinion” attitude. It’s extremely infuriating. I ask for one thing, they do another. I do feel that it stemmed from them not reporting to me originally when hired and then internal shifts happened and now I manage them.

I will be trying a new route of being direct and pointing out areas of improvement. I will be allowing them to fail and see how they correct themselves - maybe this is a better way of learning. Should it continue, I’ll have no choice but a PIP