I’m working with an attorney-husband of another female attorney. He is vile, gross, and dishonest to the extreme at work. I don’t think she knows this. Do I tell her?!?! I know it’s none of my business, but if the roles were reversed I would want to know. This guy is the worst of the worst and she is successful with a good reputation.

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It depends which is a lawyerly answer. If he's doing something that violates his duty as a lawyer, talk to his boss or report to the bar.

If he's cheating on his wife, then gather evidence and tell her.

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If someone is unethical you report that as required by law, which will result in the wife learning of it if it is serious enough to be escalated by the bar. Otherwise, if he’s just a sh*tty team member and a** that you don’t want to work with or be connected to professionally, it’s really not your business to bring his personal life into it by involving his wife unless you and his wife are friends and have a close personal relationship rather than just both being of the same profession. If someone came to me and said your husband x, y, z, I’d ask what they’ve done to address that with him directly/the proper channels, because I’d doubt whether this was a genuine concern if they had not handled this professionally and properly in the first instance and just came to me.

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She knows. Stay out of it

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I am the only one who will say this, but I say tell her. Knowledge is power. Empower her.

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I would stay out of it. But that’s just me.

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Trust that she already knows. Women who partner with vile men know that they are there to give him cover, palatability, legitimacy. He can be vile and literally hide under the skirt she intentionally covers him in. And make no mistake: she is as vile as he, she just conceals it better. If she weren’t, she would not have married him nor would she would remain married to him. Just like every toxic law firm knows about it’s bad actors so do spouses. Tell him that he’s vile and disgusting, but do not try to be friends with this woman because if you do, you’re just as bad as she is.

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No.

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