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"It’s hard knowing I might be missing out on precious moments because of work." I feel this in my soul. I'm doing the best I can to be there for everyone while still advancing in my career, and I never feel like I'm getting it right. It really eats at me, but I find some comfort in knowing I really am doing all I can. I've also started doing some journaling, which helps me keep things in perspective when I start feeling low. I'll write down little moments I've shared with the kids and look at them whenever I feel like I'm failing as a parent. I'm not perfect, but each week I end up with tons of reminders that I have made and do make them happy, which means the world to me.
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I really relate to this. Balancing work and family can feel impossible sometimes, and that guilt of missing out is so real. I love the idea of journaling those special moments. It’s such a beautiful way to remind yourself of the joy you bring to your kids’ lives! Thanks for sharing that. I might give it a try too.
I totally get it, my son is super attached and clingy with me. I feel this immense guilt that it’s because I went back to work and sent him to nursery. He’s always hated going although he’ll settle quickly once there. I just have to remind myself of all the quality time I do spend with him but it’s so hard. I do think we can’t win though. If I didn’t go back to work, I think I would struggle with that too.
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I totally get that. It’s so hard not to feel that guilt, no matter what choice we make. It sounds like you’re really mindful about making the most of your time together, and that means a lot.
Yes, it’s definitely not easy. Guilt is part of the mom checklist.
For our first, we had an apt in the same building as my MIL, so we didn’t have to send our baby to daycare, and if I was working from home, I could go downstairs and say hi and get in some snuggles.
Now that we’ve moved a little farther away and may not have help (TTC baby #2) I am seriously considering taking the risk of a break from the workforce, or a pay reduction if it’ll allow me to work remotely or more locally.
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That makes total sense! Cutting down that NYC commute would definitely be a game changer. A little less pay could be worth it for all that extra time and less stress.