If you were undecided on having another kid, how did you decide? Did you end up “knowing” eventually or just let life take its course?

We have a 2 y/o and an 8 mo old infant, and are debating if we want one more or if we’re done. Definitely already stretched really thin and generally exhausted, but also could see us being happy with 3 down the line. Unsure of what to do and I’m in my mid 30s so want to decide soon.

I had really wanted 3. We have a 5.5yr old and a 2 year old. I honestly just couldn’t picture myself pregnant again. And while I still would have loved a 3rd, I’m happy with our family as it is. We’re getting a dog instead 😅

I have a 5.5, 3.5 and 15 month old. The pregnancy and infant phase with the third was awful and near impossible. But now that she is walking and playing with her siblings we are enjoying our family.
Also I savor the lasts with her (both as an infant and now as a toddler) and enjoying it
I came across this on Facebook and it resonated

No one really prepares you for the third baby.
They come in and somehow heal parts of you that you didn’t even realize were broken.

They slow life down… and yet make you see just how quickly the years are slipping through your fingers.
They bring a balance you didn’t know your family was missing.
They teach you to savor the tiny moments, the ones you’d otherwise rush past.

The third changes everything.
They change you.
Forever. And in the most beautiful way.

I’m pregnant with my fourth right now. We toyed with the idea for more than a year before going for it, and when we did, we got pregnant right away 😅 Must’ve been fate.

We always had a "we'll have however many we are blessed with" attitude. But it took us years for our first blessing. We didn't take any preventative measures and conceived number 2 when number 1 was 22 months old. When pregnant with two, and 1 and 2 both being the same sex, we said we'd likely do a 3rd. Again, no preventative measures and we conceived 3 when 2 was just over 2 years old.

That third pregnancy damn near killed me. I had perinatal depression, which I didn't know was a thing. I also had gestational diabetes (and we learned at the baby's birth baby was *just barely* attached to the cord; it was practically colorless).

My third was my favorite baby. But having three is HARD. I do not regret this kid, but if I had the same knowledge about the difficulty of dealing with 3 instead of 2, I would take it into heavy consideration.

My health suffered so much from giving birth twice already. I do not want to go through this again, I don't think I can handle the anxiety, I do not feel like pausing my career again (I cannot do it all, at least cannot do it well).

In theory, I would love to have 3 or 4 or whatever. But in reality, I'm happy to be alive with 2. The moment #2 arrived, I knew our family was complete.

I always knew I wanted 3 kids. my husband was happy with 2. my first 2 are 16 months apart. it was a lot and we stayed as a family of 4 for a bit. 3.5 years later and we had our third. the age gap meant that my two big kids were more independent went baby came around and that made things so much better.

enjoy the time with your current family as is and don't feel like you have to decide right away.

This question lives rent free in my head

If our first kid wasn't such a challenge and we had started younger, we might have had 3. But with the difficulty factor of our first it's a miracle we even had a second 😅 but I knew I wanted at least 2 as I enjoyed growing up with siblings and was lonely when my siblings left the house.

We have 4. When I was pregnant with my 4th I was certain I didnt want anymore. Now that she is 5, I would definitely have a 5th but my 4th has special needs and logistically we cannot manage that in a way that would be fair to the other kids.

We concluded on #3 pretty naturally; we both just realized that we wanted at least one more. I will say I definitely was not thinking about it at 8 mos pp - we have 2.5yr gaps and like it.

Following this … same challenge except older 😂

Following, I’m in the same boat but older, so need to decide and try soon!

I’ve known I’ve always wanted 4. I’m mid30s and pregnant with 4th. I trusted that we’d find the strength and energy when needed. Ours are 6, 4, and almost 2. I wasn’t sure I could make it to 2 when 1st was born, apparently I had some baby blues postpartum. I was sure 100% that I still wanted all 4 when 2nd was born pretty much right after labor. Then when my 3rd was born I was still sure, but then he had an unexpected NICU stay due to getting diagnosed with Hirschsprungs Disease. After an ostomy bag, 3 surgeries, 2 procedures under anesthesia, countless ER visits/hospital stays…we knew that if we could handle that (what we couldn’t imagine) with 2 kids, we could handle 4 (even if the one gets HD too)

If you decide more kids is too much, don’t worry about it either. All kids are a blessing and your 2 current ones are perfect!

The only thing different between my first 3 and this pregnancy (got pregnant at 34 and just turned 35) is that the OB said since I’m delivering at 35, it’s considered geriatric 🤪🤣 (really…) so I have to take 1 baby aspirin a day since 12 weeks to help with preeclampsia risk.

Good luck with whatever you decide! (Sorry for the novel)

I wanted 2-3 but preeclampsia decided otherwise, so I’m trying to embrace being one and done.