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Hi fishes,
I am planning a switch so was going through some salary data for a software engineer. My ex-senior manager recommended me a website: Growceed.com which helped me a lot in getting clarification about a lot of things but I am in doubt whether the average salaries of software engineer mentioned on Growceed.com really that much in top MNC companies.
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I asked myself, if I were in their situation, who would save me? I have to make sure I'm set up to take care of me and them. Can’t pour from an empty cup
I used to feel guilty for saying no... most of my life due to rejection. I learned to use the right vocabulary to explain what was happening in my relationships at work and at home. I also started to look at whats happening clearly. I started to recognize that I was being exploited by others. That I was being disrespected by others. In both instances for when they expected me to do things when in reality it was not an obligation. If you are constantly being drained by anyone, that is not a healthy relationship. You have to see the truth in what they are also doing to you. Love doesn't exploit. Love doesn't disrespect. Love doesn't eat off your plate knowing you won't be able to eat too. Once you start saying no, I guarantee these individuals will show you who they really are. Expect to lose friends and loved ones. Be okay with that because then you'll know you weren't truly loved by them. I applaud you for taking this step. Stand your ground and do not fold. Know that you also don't owe them an explanation. Just say no, you can no longer do certain things because of other obligations. Lastly, recognize that sometimes helping folk also takes away from them growing and making better life choices to change their own situation. Stop carrying others on your back. Let them change careers, return to school, get second jobs, get roommates, downsize, etc. And although it may sound harsh, it is not. Good luck!