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Bowl Leader
Wednesday mood ❤️
Any chance of market correction this year?
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All the time. Heavy on the people not caring lol. Nobody cares. They just want the work done. Even if you sleep 2 hours a night and then die at your desk, they’d only be sad they’re being inconvenienced by having to figure out who will do the work. Some people pretend to care but almost nobody does. I won’t say “set boundaries” as that’s impossible to do in most workplaces in America especially today. But I will say as long as you allow them to take, they will, and after a period of time, rather than feeling grateful you have put yourself on the line and barely sleep or eat it will become an expectation they’ve gotten used to instead of something to appreciate. Then when you start taking 4 hours of sleep instead of 2, you will get dinged for your performance being below what they’ve gotten used to rather than then acknowledge that speed was completely unhealthy and unsustainable.
You can’t directly push back or have an attitude. You can’t tell them it’s because you’re tired because they’ll view you as whiny or weak. But you can gently orient them depending on who you’re dealing with. “hey bill. I can get you this back by Wednesday EOD.” (Rather than accepting it if they tell you they want something back same day knowing you have conflicting deadlines). If he pushes back and says Wednesday is unacceptable say, “I can try to get it to you by Tuesday EOD. Does that work?” Most partners will say yes if they can, even if they’re a-holes, or they may say Tuesday afternoon. It’s not ideal but you’ve bought yourself an extra day. This little bit helps even in a small way.
Besides that, I find us women tend to not want to bother people and don’t want to delegate. I’m actively working on this, as I struggle with it. Every time you get something, ask yourself if it can be done by a paralegal or an admin or someone more junior. If it can, push it down to them. If only some of it can be done by someone more junior or an admin/para, tell them which portions to do and to leave the rest for you. Even a 60% reduction in the amount of work you have to do for that particular work stream is better than nothing.
Beyond that, if you can, I’d be scheduling a vacation for a couple months from now so you can recover.
Even with all those adjustments and time off, it could be just that the workplace isn’t the right one and that they have unrealistic expectations. Unfortunately too many firms are like this, and sometimes the best we can do is go from a 9/10 awful firm to a 7/10, and for some even in-house can be demanding with a lack of work life balance. I’m really sorry that firm/this field is doing this to you. I get it because mine is the same. We’re on call 365 days a year and are expected to work sick or not and on vacation or not.
Rising Star
Please take sick days when you need them. Nothing is more important than your health, and it’s easy for a mild illness to worsen rapidly if you don’t rest.
Your bosses will adjust. We’re all fungible. If they have a problem with your taking sick days, it’s time to look for a new job. I hope you feel better soon.
Rising Star
Yes, with the caveat that my firehose is somewhat of my own making. All the career development endeavors are coming home to roost at once, which sounds awesome, but if I turn down something then it feels like the work I put in to get the offer was for nothing.
As far as managing workload, you have to push back to get reasonable expectations that you can maintain long-term. Training the partners on what to expect is great practice for training the clients on what to expect, and both will help create a career worth having. You are far more valuable to everyone as a healthy functional employee instead of someone on the edge of breaking down, be it mentally or physically or both. I know, all of that is easier said than done. But I speak as someone who landed in the hospital from stress-exacerbated illness, and now deals with a chronic form.
Pro
Yes. Neverending stream of overwhelm. I’m so tired. Plus having personal things to take care of…it’s so friggin hard. And now having the constant looming threat of having rights taken away every day is so draining. I lateraled to a new firm last year and the group has been much better (less demanding, more interested in developing associates skills, more focused on WLB, generally not toxic) than my last firm, so it has helped a bit, but this job is still so much to handle.
I feel your pain. Just know there are many of us out there too.