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If it’s a baby shower or wedding and you have a male boss and coworkers they often don’t think about it. Teams with more women more readily consider that.
This happened to me
I agree, women/friendships/coworkers usually are the ones that champion the event. How do you know something isn’t planned? Maybe it’s a surprise. If not, celebrate with friends outside of work!
Is it a small company/team?
I always contribute with money and good word, but don’t pay too much attention to it, and never share my milestones, including major ones. Unless you’re extremely close with them, who cares what they remember/do?
Pro
No one even realized I got married until months later! Also had male CDs. I would’ve appreciated a little gift or something but we were busy. Don’t take it personally—the people outside of work are way more worth our time and energy!
I’m going to be totally honest here, but I’m really not fussed about the milestones of my coworkers. I’m happy for them in the sense that I want them to be happy and I don’t mind signing a card and wishing them well, but if we’re not friends outside of work, I’m not buying gifts/attending a shower.
What’s your milestone? Is it something that you can make a thing of yourself? Like have your own pre-wedding work drinks one Friday night?
Or if it’s a baby maybe you can ask everyone out for a final lunch before you take mat leave. That’ll force them to think about it and you might get some love returned.
Unfortunately, like most things in life, if you want something done, you have to do it yourself.