Working from home with a 4 year old and a new pay cut. This is my day tomorrow. What the actual F am I supposed to do. Seems like employers forgot that there are still no schools, no childcare, no nannies, no play dates, no libraries, no open parks...the situation (in NYC) has not changed. And yet....

I feel you, SVP1. Oh that sprinkler image is heartbreaking, but so relatable. Doesn’t matter where you are - without childcare, school/camp programs, routines, and most importantly OTHER KIDS to engage with, they are bored, needy, and (understandably) acting out. Tonight my son stood next to my desk shouting “send your email and close the computer, momma!” while I was frantically trying to finish a script at 9 pm. It’s madness. Love to you and your little one. They will get over this. We may need extensive therapy!

I hear ya! I have a 6 yr old and 2 yr old at home who both have every intention on breaking me 😩. I’ve started blocking my calendar to only allow for meetings within a certain time frame. And I don’t feel bad about it at all.

I just held/rocked my screaming infant on back to back meetings for the sole purpose of my team seeing the acute level of stress I’m under. It’s completely unsustainable and while we aren’t too fond of sending her to daycare, she’s never been and now all this, we have in when they opened this week. We’re doing 2 days per week starting in June. I can’t fucking wait!!! At the same time, she’ll get sick and be miserable from normal daycare shit. My hubby and I just need a break. It feels like a marathon with no end.

Also, I work with so many young, single folks and feel awful when I hear “in my free time...” wtf is free time? By Friday I’m usually in tears.

Solidarity mamas 😭🤗

Right there with you... it’s insane. Felt like a shit mom today bc my 4 year old daughter was so bored she stripped down naked and started spraying herself with the hose 4 feet from where I was sitting on a video call... then proceeded to stand, not moving, wrapped in a towel under the sprinkler like the saddest kid in the world.
(We’re from NYC too and left for the lake house bc I thought she’d be more occupied being able to play outside... nope).

That is bonkers. I’m so sorry. It’s not sustainable nor is it safe, and that’s the thing some in our orgs don’t seem to understand. It’s not just about “juggling” things, we’re actively neglecting our kids for their profitability. Oh and I’m not judging, I’m right there with you and I’m just angry about it. At my company it’s not even really the higher ups, not a single person on my PM or account team has kids, so they’re just riding everyone incessantly and working crazier hours than before.

Hi everyone, OP here. Thank you so much for sharing your frustrations, solves, and WTF moments. It’s made me feel sane to know I’m not the only one feeling insane. None of my larger team/senior leadership have kids, so your kindness and words of solidarity means so much.
At 4 pm today, my son barged in my “office”/bedroom and said, “Please, please don’t do your next call! I’ll buy you an ice cream?” and emptied his piggy bank on the floor. So (stifled sobs), I wrote my team, said I’d be unavailable after 4 pm, and took him for an (masked-up) ice cream and a walk. It helped.
Of course back online at 5:30.
The pressure to be present at every last-minute regroup or zero-notice client call is immense, as we are all scared of falling behind in this climate. But as many of you have said, we need to assert our right to be with our kids, who are relying on us (and sporadic zoom classes) to help them through this impossible situation. I hope it gets better. Wishing all moms (and husbands/partners/caretakers) love, strength and a gallon size glass of wine this Friday night.

It makes me cry a little knowing how I am in the same boat. I block time off daily. But still, kids. This was all fine / cute for a few weeks, but now I’m worried for their well-being.

I feel for you so much and am in the same boat 100%, also in nyc. What the fuck are we going to do? And when is the damn DOE going to tell us what’s happening with summer/fall programs? I don’t know how much longer we can sustain this without going mad.

I feel you. I have a two-year-old and more meetings than ever. It is unsustainable. Luckily I work with a lot of female teams and we start a lot of zooms sharing our feelings of being bad moms with each other and then being there to remind each other to cut ourself some slack. The ONLY thing that might be positive from this is that the others in the agency who might not really realize what we juggle all the time are SEEING our kids there on the camera every day. Maybe this memory will stick when we go back?

Same (and both my kids are autistic, which makes this extra fun!)

Can any of them be replaced by an email? As a creative I don’t mind email feedback. It’s nice to present your first round of ideas, but I have received lots of detailed feedback via email and prefer that sometimes.

I am so sorry. You should block out some time for yourself/child care. I hope your boss would be understanding.

Yes agree on blocking out time! Hubby gets up, feeds her and plays with her from 7:30-9:30 while I sleep, eat, get out early morning emails. We are fortunate that my 2 year old has zoom classes (and genuinely loves them) from 9:30-10:30. Hubby blocks out 10:30-11 to play with her. 11-12 we struggle a bit and tag team it together. I block out 12-1:30 to feed and put her down for nap. We both frantically work from 1:30-3:30, then I block off 3:30-4:30 to do her homework/art projects, she has class again from 4:30-5 so we try to work then, and hubby is off at 5 to watch her while I finish work and make dinner. Dinner from 6-7 and then he puts her to bed while I resume work. It’s exhausting, but my work has respected this schedule pretty well.

Ugh, I’m so sorry! I don’t think I could handle a whole day of being available and juggling childcare. My husband and I have had to halve the day between us and be hardline on when we are available/online. I feel so inflexible, but it’s the only way we can both survive and not get laid off/furloughed for inefficient working. One of us does 7:30-12:30 (nap time) and the other does 3:00 (nap wake up)-8:30pm. Then we both pick up work after dinner. I’m so exhausted.

I block my calendar during chunks of time so that I can either do work or take the kiddo so my husband can. It’s been about 6 weeks since we started doing that and it’s worked pretty well for us juggling that way and only a handful of times have I needed to make exceptions during my blocked hours

Feel this. Hugs.

You have an 8:30 meeting? FFS.

Amen sister