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In my opinion sharing that you have another offer can really backfire. It really annoyed a hiring manager when I had an offer in hand verbally from the HR person after simply inquiring if they could match a different offer, the hiring manager decided to rescind their verbal offer and I never got the formal offer.
I highly recommend you just focus on what you want with the existing job and not tell them why you have a different offer. You can indirectly use the other job info in the back of your mind to negotiate the criteria for the job you want
If they were crying because another company also thought you were good enough to hire them that’s a company you don’t want to work for. They’re just whining they don’t have all the leverage. Tell them to kick rocks
Choose the one that works best for you. You have to be willing to take either offer, and I’d negotiate without bringing it up at first.
Really depends on how you do it. If there is one company that was a little lower that you would prefer it doesn’t hurt to say “hey I’d really prefer to work here but I have a competing offer for x amount more. Can you come up to get closer to it?” But I wouldn’t go back and forth more then once and also would find a way to frame it so it’s not only about the money.
Coach
In the current market there are a.hundred qualified candidates stacked up behind you. I personallybwould lean into my experience and knowledge to place me higher in theor range rather than trying to oit one offer against the other.