I hate Mother’s Day. I remember one year when my kids were young - my husband decided to have them call his mom first thing in the morning, to wish her a happy Mother’s Day. All while I was in the room, and without acknowledging me (no presents which I expected, but not even saying happy Mother’s Day to me). To this day I still have anxiety about experiencing this again.

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Have you spoken to your husband about that day? Has he repeated that on mother's day after that particular day? How old are your kids now?

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How is your relationship with your husband? How is your marriage? How old were your kids then and how old are they now?

Can understand how hurtful it would have felt then as you are their mother - however don’t let him and that incident ruin your love n this special occasion for you and your kids - hard to do I know - but just think you are their mother n if this guy (husband) is like this n you can’t change him - would you rather spend all years in this anxiety or want to move on and have special day with love with your kids.
Remember what he does is not in your hands - but you can changeand control your part of narrative n choose to celebrate.
I am in similar boat with highly self absorbed and ignorant husband - so I know how that feels.

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VERY relatable. it's gone from not having the ability to be with my mother (on the other side of the country) to being forced to celebrate his mother, even when I had become a mother, to now tiptoeing around the day because he's lost his mother.
FFS

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I told my friend today that I don't like having to "share" Mother's Day. It's more complicated and way more daunting having to think about a thoughtful gift—and also spend money and/or time—to make them feel special when I already have next to no time for myself between a baby and a toddler. I'd rather it not exist as a "holiday" at all and just focus on bdays instead.

FWIW, I love my mom and MIL to bits, but my mom is out of state and my MIL is temporarily living with us.

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I also dislike Mother’s Day. We have to orbit around my narcissistic mother. This year, I told my husband Saturday was my Mother’s Day, and we celebrated me today. I actually enjoyed it.

That’s a good idea !

My kids are in junior high school (12 and 14) and my husband says do I still buy gifts for them .. you aren’t my mom. I said well they don’t have their own money .. so yes, you have to take them and buy a gift. I couldn’t believe he said that to me!

He says well I have to get my mom a gift and I said be glad your mom is here to do that (as my own mom is not here anymore).

I have always felt i wouldn’t have a day until
My own mother in law is gone. Today we will go to some expensive place my sister in law chose and I will be stuck paying for us all (as my husband will say he doesn’t have enough on his account.). It’s not a fun day for me at all.

I hate Mother’s Day too. My mom died 5 years ago, before my son was born, and it hurts so much. My dad’s new wife (he remarried 4 years ago), my husband’s mom, and my husband’s stepmom all expect a lot (despite not really being there for me or helping with the baby at all) and I don’t like having to push myself for them.

My husband (and father of my children) still has not said happy mothers day to me. Why? Because he was harsh with one of our kids last week and I asked him not be so explosive over minor infractions. So 3 days of holding it over my head and not even a 'happy mothers day' for me. What a great guy.

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