I'm almost 50, and lately I've been thinking a lot about my decision not to have children. Friends on FB share pics of their kids, and my heart melts. My husband was always clear he didn't want them, and I went along with that with no regrets. Just wondering if any of you who also prioritized a child-free partnership ever question that decision as you get older?

Sometimes but I have the most amazing niece & nephew and more discretionary income- plus you don’t know how the kids would have come out…

I would encourage you not to dwell on the things you can’t change OP. I think there are upsides and downsides to having or not having kids. But at the end of the day, the richness of our lives is defined by how and what we choose to appreciate. Lean in to the life you chose and celebrate the things that make it rich! 😘

I think it might be a grass is always greener scenario. It's not always magical and can often be a massive struggle. I have friends that have kids with special needs and I'm not saying at all that they regret their kids, but it is obvious that life is different than they dreamed of. If you have nearly perfect children, then sure missing out on that would be ashame, but few couples are so lucky. I think the whole experience is romanticized and what you see in pictures is not the totality of it but rather the golden moments. Just because you don't have your own doesn't mean you need to miss out on the experience completely. Try becoming a foster parent or volunteering at your local park district or school. Offer to babysit for friends and family as well. If after these experiences you still believe you would rather be a mother than not, then try to work with an adoption agency or adopt from foster care.

It is easy to feel regret when you are only looking at the ‘good’ times. I really think either way you’ll always feel like you missed out on something. Whether it was having or not having kids, making this or that choice. It’s natural, but find the happiness you do have from the choices you made.

You’re not alone. I’ve had those quiet moments of wondering too, especially when friends talk about becoming grandparents. But I also think about the freedom I’ve had to pursue my passions, travel, and lead teams I care about. It’s okay to feel both gratitude and curiosity about the road not taken.

Have two children that i enjoy - however, they do have many challenges especially as they are in their teens! Every day can be a battle. I'm so grateful and cherish them. My career stalled s bit because of wanting to be there for the children when needed. There are tradeoffs!

I’m 54 and at a young age (18-21) declared myself as not interested in having children. I have zero maternal instincts and had zero desire to raise another human.

First husband agreed as did my current. No wondering, no regrets. We love our life together as it is.

I had my lid when I was 41. No regrets, but it certainly affected my career and travel for the first ten years - you can’t have everything even if you outsource a lot. Kids need parents, not just Nannies and expensive camps. Now I’m wondering sometimes should I had a second one back then when it was possible? My answer: it’s a good dream and idea but I wouldn’t be able to handle it without significant detriment to my health, finances, hobbies, etc. because now I know it, I’m not just wondering.

Being over 50 I can say that your feelings are normal. I questioned myself and I have many friends that went through this too. I guess I always assumed I’d have kids, then met my husband at 40, married at 42. We talked about kids and decided to enjoy our nieces and nephews. For me, with a new marriage, high demand job, I felt that I’d feel completely stress out, exhausted and failing at it all. At this point, I’d suggest to figure out how to feel comfortable or even better, good, about your decision. If that is calling about it more with friends and family, therapy, or just making a list of pros/cons, what your life would be like, etc, do that you can truly understand why your feeling the way you are. You are not alone and big hugs!