I’m pregnant with my first child and it feels like I’m slacking in every area (work and home mainly) and it’s starting to feel so overwhelming. I’m trying to give myself grace but I can’t bring myself to do what I have to do. It’s starting to make me an emotional wreck. Anyone felt like this? I’m 22 weeks.

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Work is one thing - but you areNOT slacking at home. Whatever it is, you’re bringing a child into this world. You’re focusing on that. Let everyone else do the home things.

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Being pregnant is HARD work. Do the best you can do. Maybe check with your HR to see if you can work from home instead of going into the office (get a doctors note if you need). What do you feel like you’re “slacking” on at home? If you have a partner at home, maybe discuss with them? If you can outsource things (cleaning, cooking, etc.) then do that!

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I am HR and work from home since I have my business, so I feel extra guilty with how I’ve been slacking. I’ve never apologized to my clients so much smh.

My husband is amazing and always make sure our laundry is done, the kitchen is clean and dinner made on the days he can. But since he’s going into work, I’m watching everything else getting cluttered around the house. I want to do it but have zero energy. We had someone come in earlier in the month to clean and we’re just back here. I feel like I can easily do some things but can’t bring myself to do it. I’ve never felt like this before but I’ve also never carried a child before lol.

You’re probably right, you aren’t crushing it anywhere right now. You’re probably missing some non-critical meetings and bailing on social engagements. You’re probably taking a little longer to turn things around. Your house is probably kind of a mess. You probably don’t look your best most days.

I taught myself to address the stress of these feelings with 2 words, “oh well.”

Just say it out loud, and shrug your shoulders. This isn’t your “crushing all the things” chapter. It’s your “prioritize rest and good quality food and doing what you can when you’re able” chapter. Things will continue without you doing your best right now. It’s all temporary.

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I say this with gentleness and empathy as a mother of three small children: you will continue to feel this feeling for a long time to come. As others have said, you are NOT slacking and start practicing grace and compassion for yourself. Pregnancy is so hard. Being a working parent is hard. Sometimes, just being a human is hard. Start building your support now: see a therapist, outsource whatever you can, be realistic about your capacity and limitations and respect those. You are doing great. Just take it one day at a time.

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This 👆🏻

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Yes. I don’t know why no one told me pregnancy was going to be an awful experience and I am going to come short in every area of my life. I don’t understand how women claim they don’t when your hormones are off the charts, you feel sick constantly, and insomnia is so common. I guess some of them get lucky? I don’t know. All I can say is that I have hated pregnancy every step of the way and will never have another child after going through this once.

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Literally feeling the same way! Lol. One and done!

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My kids are 5 and 9 and I still feel like this. And I don't say that to minimize your feelings, I say that with support and commiseration.

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28 weeks and I am feeling the same.

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It’s rough! I hope we find some energy before our third trimester where I hear we will have zero energy

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Echoing others that you are not slacking… you’re building a whole human and most of us FEEL it.

Ask for more help from your partner if you have one at home and at work. I’m on pregnancy #2 and am telling my bosses right at 7 weeks when I go get my ultrasounds and confirm a heartbeat because I’m already nauseous and struggling. I was by myself for the first pregnancy (husb was deployed) and the house was an absolute afterthought. I had premade meals most nights (factor, bagged salads with frozen meat in the air fried, take out) because I could not stomach the smell of stuff being cooked for at least six months. Our cleaning service came once a month and I should’ve done twice a month tbh but it was just me, so I didn’t think we needed it—but up to you. Make your life as easy as possible!

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Just letting you know you’re not alone. 18 weeks with my first and feeling the same way. Some days feel impossible. Rooting for you!

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Rooting for you too!!!

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Putting pressure on a pregnant person is crazzzyyy. You do your best and then take a nap. Now is not the time to receive stress or criticism from anyone

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You are doing an incredible and taxing thing which is growing a baby. You aren’t slacking… quite the opposite!!!

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Outsource all you can. You will need that for a while when the baby is born. You will be exhausted in the last months and after it is born. Just focus on taking care of you and the baby. I agree with asking to work from home. Just do work and be pregnant.

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