Is NYC still worth it if you're single and mid-30s? Between being frugal throughout my 20s, living in cheaper cities, and some investments that have done well, I'm pretty financially well-off on paper, but I don't earn a super high wage (TC is ~$225K). I feel like my youth is running away from me and I'm intrigued by the idea of living in NYC, but am worried about the COL. Are there good middle grounds between Manhattan and a commute that still are fun for single 30-somethings? TIA!

Might be a bit of a contrarian take, but it totally depends on your personality.

What makes NYC great is the sheer diversity of cuisines, bars, people, and arts in a small space. However, for that to matter you need to be the kind of person that actually likes to often eat and go out or visit museums, plays, etc.

You’re also paying a considerable premium to enjoy that in NYC, so if you’re the type of person who doesn’t like to go out, cooks daily, doesn’t often visit museums / Broadway shows. enjoys their space, or is a big nature / outdoorsy type of person, not sure you’re going to get good value in NYC vs other big but cheaper U.S. cities like a Chicago.

You only live once. I asked myself at 28 if I should go be a ski bum for a couple years. But what about my career!? The answer was yes, zero regrets. In my early 20's I wondered whether I should keep the job I hated or go follow the Grateful Dead around for a while. I chose the latter. Zero regrets. In my 40's I wondered if I should take a job that allowed me to surf every day or take more money but move into the heart of Silicon Valley. I chose the former. Zero regrets. After a divorce in my 40's, I had a house, a great job, and tons of potential to accumulate more stock and get promotions. I'd always wanted to travel but thought selling everything and taking off seemed a bit risky. After about 10 minutes of thinking about it and weighing my options and having lunch with a friend who made a ton of money and had a wife and kids and a great house and was miserable, I bought a one way ticket to Mexico (and then kept going south). Most of the stuff I got rid of I didn't need anyway and didn't miss any of it. zero regrets. 18 months later I came back and found a pretty good job. Then an opportunity came up to move to Amsterdam to try and make a go of a relationship with a Dutch woman I met while traveling. No job, no idea what I was going to do. But what about my career!? I moved, zero regrets. When we decided to part ways I thought about returning to the US because I had a couple warm leads on jobs. I thought it was prudent to pursue them. Or I could stay in Europe and travel for a few months. I chose the latter. Zero regrets. Now I'm 60 with another great job that I'm using to stuff my retirement accounts (because I also never had any debt). So you do you. But you only live once. Retirement is boring. Travel and live in cool places when you're young. Work when you're old, and have zero regrets.

26M, moved to NYC last fall with ~$120k TC and ~$200k NW. also very frugal. Grew up in suburb of Albany (T3 city), wanted to move here for the the exact same reasons as you: FOMO. I wanted to go to Yankees, Mets etc games all of the time and Broadway shows. I also love visiting cities.

Since moving here I just continued working 50 plus hours and wanted to just chill on the weekends. I get overwhelmed by all of the people here and the heat. I also spend less on rent to save money but that means no in unit laundry, so I have to go to a laundromat which is a pain and the hours are inconvenient. I don’t like carrying groceries a half mile in the heat. I could spend more money to eliminate some of my frustrations but my frugality gets in the way.

When I lived in a smaller city I would go walk around parks/nature regularly on the weekends. I like being outside and having grass. Moving to the city didn’t change me like. I’ve ultimately found that while I love visiting cities I don’t like the logistics of actually living in them.

When my lease is up this fall I’ll be moving back upstate. I don’t regret moving here, I would have regretted it if I didn’t do it. But one year was enough. My team is remote so it won’t affect my job, and while my salary will go down so will my taxes and rent, the difference in disposable income will be marginal.

I did hope to tap into the dating pool here but realized that given I didn’t want to stay in the city there was no reason to start a serious relationship with someone who lived here.


Feel free to DM me if you have questions

Do one year in a cramped Manhattan apartment and you’ll be cured of the “what if” FOMO feeling for the rest of your life. It may be the most fun year of your life but you’ll be glad it’s a memory. It’s best to do this when you are young without a family yet. I say go for it and then reevaluate after a year.

You're telling me that 225k a year (plus good savings already) is making you uneasy about living in NY? Most people here live on salaries under 100k. As in, the majority, not just some. Obvs depends on you very much and I respect the financial drive, but come on. If you think that wouldn't be enough either you're paranoid or you're out of touch with reality.

NYC is always worth it if it’s the kind of place that suits your personality and goals. The whole city is expensive, but you’ll find more value in Brooklyn or Queens than Manhattan, and the transit is robust. People also like Jersey City and Hoboken, but they’re not part of the city and it’s obvious.

You could also do the Bronx, but that’s kinda far from everything. And Staten Island is basically Jersey, so hard pass.

You can eat bagels and pizza and have a small apt and be in the greatest city ever. If you want to be a baller, go elsewhere.

225 is pretty good compared to avg tc in NYC

Yes. A guy who moved from a T3 to NYC in his early 30’s

I feel that. I am 30 and just moved here, but I can tell I don’t have the personality to stay long term. Would have loved starting out my career here though when I was in my early 20s. I’m going to do the shows/museum circuit and eat some good food for a couple years and then move somewhere more affordable/humble. No shame in NYC not being right for you.

That depends. Do you want to live in a ridiculously expensive, crime-ridden, socialist/communist city run by crazy people?

If I were you I’d move. Sounds crazy, but you can always just go and try it, and if it’s not for you then move back after a year. Way more common than you think. I’d prefer to move, and learn it’s not for me than not move and have it eat at me the rest of my life as this regret of something I should have experienced

You’re approaching 40, you saved money but didn’t really live, you feel like something is missing and you want more from life.

Is NYC the answer? Maybe. It depends if you’re willing to step outside of your comfort zone in terms of 1) spending and 2) activities (gym, hiking, playing sports). It will require more money for sure, but only you will be able to determine what’s worth it. Will you put effort and $ into dating?

I enjoy the many restaurants, museums, parks, concerts, theatre, many free events, the diversity, the proximity to beaches and mountains. Manhattan and BK waterfront are expensive (4-6k for 1B) but there areas in BK and Queens (ie Astoria) with more reasonable prices. Look on Street Easy.

There is also a 3rd tax, city tax. Look at online paycheck calculators.

Totally worth it for a season. I’m from Long Island, went to college in the city, lived there after in manhattan and BK. Moved back to LI as we bought a house recently. I miss the city energy, walkability, abundance of things to do. But whatever. It was time for us to buy and potentially expand the fam.

Honestly, you'd have to be completely out of your mind if you are even considering moving to NYC with what's happening there with the terrible communists that are being elected. The city has a few years of viability left before it turns into 1970's NYC with very little hope of turning around anytime soon. You couldn't pay me enough to move to that city, mostly because it doesn't matter how much you pay me, the politicians will find a way of taking it all from me. NYC officially HATES success and wealth now. Plenty of other great cities to move to and not have to worry about that.

As someone that moved 30 yes and it’s nice bc you have less fomo, more money and understand your priorities ( well I’m assuming :) ).

Tbh you’ll get more value in Hoboken and can still easily get into the city. I’m biased though. Currently entertaining an opportunity in Manhattan with $~550k TC and will stay in Jersey but I have a house and young kids - if I was single I’d want to be in a city.

It’s worth it for a couple of years max, just to get the experience of it and all the benefits that it adds to your character and skills. Preferably stay in Manhattan, commutes are not fun even if they seem near enough. Busy hours make everything double or triple up. Add weather abnormalities to it from time to time and it becomes annoying fast. I wouldn’t stay longer than two years though. By the third year it becomes a mix of life moving too fast and too many compromises on conveniences that other cities or suburbs enjoy. You’ll still want to visit NYC forever, as it’s always fun for a few days, or even weeks if you can work remote or take long vacations. Make sure it’s on good weather months, meaning not winter or summer.

I had the same dilemma about moving to Miami from Raleigh, NC, as I have been going to Miami every 2-3 months for 3 years and thought it was the city for me. To try it out, I drove there and stayed there for 2 weeks to see how living there would be. I'm glad I did that, as after 1 week I learned it was very different than visiting, so I would highly recommend spending a couple of weeks or a month there at an Airbnb or something to see if it's for you before moving. The reasons I didn't see myself living there was quality of life: 1. Traffic was horrific (1hr for a 5 mile drive to the gym during 5pm traffic); 2. People are more transient and it's hard to make genuine connections; 3. You either carry groceries for a mile or drive that mile in the same time you'd walk; 4. Cost of living was not justified and I always felt poor even tho I have a similar take home pay as you. I was in my early 30s when I tried this but again, would highly recommend just staying there for 2-4 weeks to see if it's for you. Best of luck!