I’ve recently moved countries my wife is 6 months pregnant and a SAHM and we have a 3 yo toddler. I travel weekly for work and its becoming exhausting having my wife nag all the time of being a lot and tired. We have a full time nanny that helps but wife is constantly involved. I am always worried about them when i travel and feel guilty that family is not doing great especially that my toddler is constantly having temper tantrums, not sleeping at night, wetting himself at night. I need advice!

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Every family unit needs to find the setup that works for them and there is no one size fits all. Some couples would feel fine with heavily traveling breadwinner + SAHP + full time nanny. This setup may seem fine on paper and work for others, but is it working for either your wife or yourself (physically and emotionally)? A traveling high octane professional lifestyle can work before family enters the picture but many do step off the path with growing competing family demands. Happiness in the home matters more than career. Would ask yourself the question about the right / acceptance mix of time for you and your wife once you have 2 kids in the picture. Life changes and we change too. It's ok if the answer is different than it would have been a few years ago.

Is there an option where you can travel less for the next few months that will allow you to figure out a model that works? Even to create the setup takes time and effort, and hard to do when away

I moved from MBB to a BIG consulting position. Missing the moments with your family, you can not get back. I only took a paycut of about 2-3%.

The new role is not as challenging, but my wife started working again part-time, and we are both happier.

Watching over a toddler and being pregnant must be exhausting doing everything by yourself.

If I found myself stuck at home with my 3 yr old, doesn’t matter how much I love him I’d eventually go insane. Theoretically with a nanny it seems like a cakewalk, but some mothers simply can’t kick their feet up while in the same house with the nanny. I was previously in engagement management btw, and I needed to be home to have a better idea of what was “really” going on.

People will disagree with me here, but I don’t believe you can travel weekly (M-Th) and have a happy and stable SAHM and kid. Someone is sacrificing (and it’s not you)

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