When Judge James Brown asked, “So what was stolen was the cheese?,” Piwowarczyk kept an admirably straight face as he replied, “The defendant was informed that it was not yo’ cheese.”

Funniest thing I ever heard in bond court.

Is it okay to trim your chest hair?

Note: Not the entire chest, just the hair visible in case your top 2 buttons are open/or the hair which is above your vest area.

Does anyone know the pay increase from Analyst to Senior Analyst for Midwest/Chicago office?

6lpa ADP v 7lpa tcs digital (New Delhi) as fresher?

Which practice group (m&a, capital markets, or funds) would be best for someone who genuinely doesn’t care about this job/law but wants to stay in biglaw (NYC) as long as possible? Some folks say m&a is more “intellectually stimulating” and I wonder, for that reason, perhaps capital markets might suit me? (I’d rather take mind numbing repetitive tasks over more “challenging” deals)

Help! What the hell was I think switching to transactional real estate with a small corporate component? 😳 I feel so rushed all the time, like I can’t get a second to focus and these documents are endlesssss and boringggg. I’m a second year in a mid sized firm that pays close to big law and works opposing big law. Words of inspiration or wisdom, please.

Can any one help me prep for a Tech. Mfg. PM role interview? Any tips on what questions to prepare for?

Anyone know what the comp looks like for corp strat associates? M’s? Directors?

Make body transformation possible at 31? Used to be athletic, now drink a 6 pack and say ready to party.

Has anyone tried PRP treatment for hair loss?
I don't have male pattern baldness, but patchy hair loss and doctors are saying two session of prp would be enough.

Is it good? Whether it restored your hairs?

A customer brought me a Christmas gift today. So sweet. What's the nicest thing a customer has ever done for you?

How much leave encashment is given in globant on relase

How long is too long to try to push back a start date? Getting a formal offer early next week but trying to keep that big law bonus if possible. Firm pays out bonuses Dec 30 & I have a vacation scheduled Dec 19-23 (and was planning on working remotely the week after too). Ideally want to get EOY bonus or negotiate for a signing bonus but is it too much to push for signing bonus and those weeks off? I'm open to working remotely those two weeks but know that may not be the best when I start.

One of my junior associates recently resigned and I've been trying to make an exit myself for several months now. The job market has been really competitive but I am getting closer to getting a new job and moving on. The firm culture isn't great and work-life balance is non existent. My physical and mental health have been suffering, so I really don't think I could stay. How did you avoid the guilt trips from Partners/Senior staff trying to get you to stay?

Anyone got Danaher or Gordon videos yet? They have good discounts.

Can anyone help me or suggest me with accomodation in whitesfield near to cg office?
under 10k.

Who wants to start a DAO and buy time shares (literally lmao) in a watch.

Can rotate throughout the year 😂

If you get a very uncompetitive offer from a company and you counter, and they decline every element of your counteroffer what does it say about the company in your opinion? Would you still take the opportunity?

I have an EdTech client looking to hire a lead designer. They're looking for someone with 5+ years experience and background in either early education or consumer mobile apps. Fully remote (US company). Great team. DM for details.

Back when I was in private practice and I thought our expert was in trouble, judge to other side’s expert on cross: “Sir, your answers are duplicitous and evasive. Your prevaricating is annoying this court.” I had to look up “prevaricate” but it is verb I use a lot now. I like it.

At motions hearing — Opposing counsel had a hot mic before judge entered court room.
Junior OC to Senior OC (who is arguing) in hushed voices: “whatever you do, don’t bring up X case from our brief, it’s actually terrible for our position.”

Best courtroom story/drama in the past couple weeks...go

Funniest courtroom story you have? Could use a laugh today!

Judge: This is your court appointed counsel, Mr...
Alleged perpetrator: Oh hey, Mr D!!! Look I'm not in orange this time!

Hoping someone else will share!!

Domestic Violence docket: mother accused of assault & battery against her adult daughter... Defendant: You mean it's illegal to smack my own daughter?!
Judge: Yes, ma'am. Especially,when your daughter is in her 40s"
Defendant: well ----, that's the problem these days.

At court during the child support docket for non payment: Judge to defendant: Mr. X I see you have 7 open support cases. You, know what your problem is? You need to stop making babies.

Custody case last week.

On direct: Dad testifying about how his contact name in Mom's phone is baby daddy. (Pretending to cry): "it's derogatory, I know my child thinks I'm just a baby daddy."

During recess: Me to the GAL: will you dare me to sing the baby daddy song in court?
GAL: I'd pay to see that.

Me, on cross: Mr. L, isn't that an inside joke bt you and Ms. L. Doesn't it come from the song from the 90s, "who dat is, that's just my baby daddy, who dat is..." (singing the song in th

Person: They called the cops on me.
Attny: On what grounds?
Person: They said I hit them with a bag of frozen fish.
Attny: And did you have a bag of frozen fish?

* silence *

Person: Yes.

🐟 🐠 🐡

DV DOCKET. Judge to clerk (not realizing his Microphone is on): Let's see what they did to deserve this sh*t.