BAD CLIENTS

"Aspirationallly diabetic”

Just me or has "breakthrough" replaced the word "disruptive"? Seeing clients use it everywhere.

"More aspirational but less white...” 🤦🏽‍♂️

CMO told me to give the agency feedback: “There’s no there there. It needs more.”

🤯

Client came to my agency needing a redesign of their awful corporate website. In a meeting, their VP of Marketing made a joke about how ugly the old site was and an AE chimed in (cont)

(Contd) We knew there was no way she could ever afford Harrison Ford, so we called and he told us he wasn't interested at any price. She still made us write the script and test it...

I had a client force us to write a TV script and work Harrison Ford into it somehow, just so she could meet him. It was a Pharma spot and we already had a successful campaign.

Our client backs us into a corner to agree to deadlines, and then makes it impossible to make them (literally just doesn’t show up for reviews, etc). I’m worried they’re trying to make up an excuse -

Once had a client switch scheduled TV shoot dates on us twice in the week leading up to the shoot. I had to call the production team and switch permits, change locations, book alt talent, change ...

Client: Make sure to add TMs whenever [brand name] appears on the storyboard

WHAT?????

I set up this PowerPoint for how I think it should look.

Client says there is too much content planned in monthly calendar and tells us to remove half the posts because we need to focus on quality, not quantity. Sends over updated calendar. Client says...

Client demands we remove 2 different people from their account in 2 months — for nit-picky pretty ridiculous reasons. One month later complains that there is too much turnover on the team.

PRO TIP: want a client to call you back? Sit down at your desk with a hot lunch and the phone will ring before you can pick up your fork.

Client complains I’m not responsive enough on email (I respond within 10 mins every time) so I start replying even faster. Client says there is too much back-and-forth and I need to cut down on emails

Any client who spells it as “wholistic” and expects me to take them seriously

Had a client that busted us for every typo and issue regardless of what stage we were in.
We got retentive about it. A year later we were named agency of the year. Plaque: “with sincere apprecation&qu… more

Any client who thinks they’re your only client.

Client doesn’t like the scripts client throws scripts at account director. Client walks away

Client: We’ve had a historic year in large part due to your work! Thank you! You’re the best! Now, unfortunately, we’ll need to move the relationship from a retainer model to a project by project one.

Client asks to change 3 week project to a 4 day project in an email after canceling our call to discuss. Then puts up an out of office reply 5 minutes later and goes out for the rest of the day.

Produce full photo shoot of a group in varying ethnicities, etc. Shot selected for final ad is of two people.

Client asks us to retouch one of people to a different ethnicity...

No.

Client: can you send me the final spot?
*sends link (via their YouTube) to client*
Client: is that the same spot we approved?
🙄

Client: Can you make this PDF a PPT?
Me: No, it was built in InDesign.
Client: Are you sure this wasnt a PPT saved out as a PDF? I see the little thumbnails on the side like in PPT.
*slaps forehead*

Client: We need a hashtag
Me: Here’s a great option.
Client: Cool but can we instead do #FullCompanyNameSoPeopleKnowItsUsFullCampaignTitleThatIs8WordsLong2018?

Client: “We are doing a joint marketing effort with some sales partners. Can you please get back to me with a calculation on the impact of investing $10K in New York City and Tokyo”
Me: 🙄🔫

Understand we're in a meeting until 5:30 today but really hoping I can get this before EOD to share with the team.

We’d like to have a DAILY status check for 30 minutes to “just check-in."- healthcare client (paid and organic social)

Client: “I do not want my ads to run on mobile phones. It is so small. There is no impact - total waste of money" 🙄

“Please send through the below metrics. These were repeatedly requested starting early last week and I can’t understand why we do not yet have them.” ...on email string with all results as requested

“We know we didn’t document this requirement but it’s your fault for not asking us.” 🙄

"We’re going for more somber than eerie.”

“Totally get that the logo is placed carefully in line with design principles and to complement the overall composition and that people hate big logos on social, but can we make it bigger?”