How do you handle two young kids when solo parenting? I currently have a 2.5yo and 8wk old. My partner is back to work while I’m still on leave. I solo parent for bedtime and also one day a week. What made bedtime easier for you and any other tips and tricks to handle 2 under 3?

Been in this situation a lot. When my youngest was up to 3ish months old, I could hold him in the carrier and he'd be fast asleep unbothered while I put my toddler to sleep. Once he got old enough and needed a proper bedtime routine, I turned the TV on to occupy my toddler while putting baby to sleep, then put big sis to sleep after. Not proud of my use of TV time, but you gotta do what you gotta do.

We have an almost-4yr old and a 7mo old. My best advice, especially as you advance toward a more predictable schedule, is to try to stagger bedtimes. Try to get the older kid down while the baby is sleeping, then get the baby down at the end of their next wake window.

For us, this looked like the older one getting ready for bed at 8PM and going down at 8:30. Baby would wake at about 8:30 and be back down by 10 or 10:30. That would get us until about 3AM or so when we did the overnight feed, then they’d both wake up around 7 or 7:30AM. Worked pretty well, took the stress down, and allowed me to feel like I had 1:1 time at bedtime with each of them.

At that age, I would just have the younger one with me for most of the bedtime routine and put the younger one in one of their chairs outside the room for a few minutes at the end of it.

I’m having flashbacks to this stage 😂 the baby had no predictable sleep schedule at that age but my toddler did. I would put the baby in a bouncer or boppy as i did my toddlers routine. My kids are almost 2 and 4 now and they still get ready together (my husband doesn’t come back until 7pm and then helps out at the very end)

Naptime and bedtime are the hardest. We had a portable baby seat so baby would go in that for bath time. Then we would all read books. Then I would nurse baby while toddler played with her Tonie. Then baby would go back in the rocker seat and I would cuddle with the toddler until toddler went to sleep. Then baby and I left the room and did whatever.

I don’t know if you have family near by, but when they got older (baby around 6-8 months) I had my mom start to come over and help with bedtime. She will read my toddler endless books while I get baby to bed and then I do bedtime with toddler. My toddler loves these nights because normal nights she gets 2 books and these nights are special because she can read as many books as she wants.

We have the same gap (almost a 2.5 year old and an 8 week old). I only have had to solo parent at night, not during the day; but typically, I try to time dinner for the toddler when the baby is napping or at least content to chill in a carrier. Then we play - mostly independent or slight interactions from me with the toddler - before we start bedtime routine. For bed time, we try to do that with the baby in his crib, but sometimes the baby will scream unless he is held upright; in that case, I basically one-arm getting my toddler ready for bed and do our books, teeth brushing, etc., one-handed.

On nights I solo parent, I order takeout to make everything easy, or I have leftovers. I don’t eat myself until after the toddler is in bed. I give myself lots of grace; the house is going to be a disaster when my husband gets home, but it’s okay.

Piggybacking with a follow up question as I've been thinking about this while pregnant with #2:

Any tips for a combined bedtime routine for both kids once they're a little older (i.e., when the youngest is around 18-24 months) and when they both have their own room? Considering turning my loft into a bedtime/story time lounge, but maybe it's better if each child gets one-on-one time in their respective bedrooms instead?

It depends on the age of the kids and when the baby needs to fall asleep. If you need to put the baby to sleep before the toddlers, can you have them listen to a Yoto or watch a show or play? If you need to put the toddlers to bed first, I usually have the baby in the carrier and I also put a bouncer near the bath and in the toddlers bedroom. We just had our 3rd and it seems to always take a while to figure out bedtime solo once you add another kid to the mix