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Early 30s, Female, Texas. Indian Ethnicity. HMU!
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Don't be ashamed to take meds. Sometimes, your brain needs a little kickstart reset.
I was badly depressed for a year and not quite myself for an additional six months after that. Going on meds would have reduced my suffering. Listen to the voice that's telling you to get more support.
Yes, I went back to work after 6 months of mat leave. Going back to work helped, honestly. It created structure for my day, reminded me that I had a whole life outside of my child and helped me feel competent again. I struggled with immense feelings of failure vis a vis my daughter, convinced I could never give her the life she deserved. I returned to therapy shortly after her birth and stayed in therapy for a *long* time after, so don't stop doing that. My husband was supportive physically but not emotionally i.e. he took care of almost everything in the house and would spend lots of time with our daughter but couldn't comfort me or be any kind of sounding board. My depression stemmed from a traumatic birth experience, an emotionally abusive mother, and a history of depression before giving birth. But working through that made me the person I am today. I just didn't need to white knuckle it as much as I did, hence my recommendation to take the meds.
That sounds atypical to me. I think most women feel a little wonky for a couple of years (your hormones don’t re-regulate until like a year after you stop breastfeeding!), but by 6 months I was able to function, work, live life, etc. I would talk with your doc and a therapist—your hormones might be off or you might be vitamin deficient in something (iron?).