I have always been a very lazy/demotivated person. I don’t workout, I don’t read, I don’t eat healthy. I just sleep all day on weekends. I have become a little more active since getting in a relationship, but that too has its upper limit. Work keeps me busy during the weekdays, but there as well I don’t feel the urge to give my best, and instead look for alternate careers that can get me into a “flow” state (not found yet). Do you have any recommendations on how to live a better life? I am 36.

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Get treatment for chronic depression.

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What does a better life mean to you? If you can define that in a few categories (Health/Nutrition, Activity, Hobbies, etc) then take baby steps to make progress toward your vision. Don't try to do it all at once. And it helps to focus on your why for the changes.

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Focus on a few small manageable changes at a time. Get a physical and blood work if you haven’t lately. Make sure you’re drinking enough water. Try to eat some veg, and take a multivitamin. Walk outside for at least 10 minutes a day (30 is ideal but start small).

As you start to get a bit more active you can take more steps. Things like auditing your time- what are you spending the hours of your life on? It helps to see data.

smart

What moves you to have a better life than what you have right now? Unless there’s motivation, things don’t happen.
I’m older - while I was intensely motivated and ambitious at work, I wasn’t really disciplined about my health habits. But a close family member’s personal health diagnosis and my own aging process woke me up.
Now I’ve drawn lines around my work and my health and lifestyle and ensure very high focus on both.
Not perfect but getting there.
In your case, how’s your partner’s approach to health and staying active during the weekends. Sometimes, having somebody hold you accountable helps.
Or else, get a health and mindfulness coach to help you through the process.
Good luck. You’re at the right age to get this done.

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Sounds like you have a major depressive disorder and I would seek therapy for this. You’ll be surprised how much good it will do.

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What do you want your life to look like? What do you value? When you're on your deathbed someday, what do you want to look back on? You're still young enough to live whatever life you want....you just need to decide what that is and then make a plan. Want to travel to every state? Start small and drive to the closest one for a weekend. Want to run a marathon? Start running a mile/day until you feel like you could train for a 5K. Want to make a positive impact on the world? Sign up for a volunteer shift at a food bank. I'd highly suggest taking some time to brainstorm, make a vision board, pick some goals....then decide on one or two baby steps to get started. You are in control.

Read Designing Your Life and The Upward Spiral

Therapy, movement (even just walking, that's where I'm at, but try to do some cardio and strength), eating good with *lots of fiber* (diet has a large effect mood). Talk to your doctor because you may have some form of depression. If you need to be scared into improving, go get a physical, being sedentary is awful for your health and it probably shows in the numbers. But also, don't let others define happiness for you. It's perfectly fine to lead a slow life, just make sure you take care of your body and mind.
I'm by no means perfect either, finding motivation is really hard and I've been struggling with doing things I know I should do. Part of it's diagnosed neuro-chemical stuff, part if it's burnout out work, part of it's a result of circumstances, part of it's my own lack of discipline. But I still have my walks and a decent diet, I'll be trying to layer on a little more a bit at a time, you should join me!

Start getting physical activity and eating food that energizes you. You will feel better and more inspired to continue doing things. You just have to rip the bandaid off and start.

What you’re doing is actually the hard way. The easy way is activity, eating well, and taking care of yourself. Your physical and mental health will both improve. I’m at the point where I literally can’t eat unhealthy or not exercise because I know how crappy it would make me feel.

Sounds like you are missing meaning and purpose in life. If you don’t have meaning or purpose life is empty. Another issue I see from your post is lack of discipline for meeting set goals. If you hold yourself accountable to meeting goals you set for yourself the mind may want to change for the better. I would recommend setting goals, building habits, then building discipline on meeting those set goals.

Ambition is not something that can be taught. Don't want to spend time "life coaching", which you might need - But I will offer this - Be grateful - show gratitude explicitly everyday with everyone you meet. Perhaps the universe is just waiting on you.

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