Our firm holiday party is tonight and I already feel the social calculus. How festive is too festive? Do you nurse one drink all night or risk being that person? It’s supposed to be fun, but it feels like a performance review in cocktail form. I want to relax and be human without creating regret. How do you handle holiday parties?

likefunny
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Don’t get drunk or be an ass. That pretty much sums it up.

likesmart

I’m sober so I’d just not drink at all and find that nobody cares, but if you want to seem casual and not overdo it, nursing one drink is fine. Maybe two if you know that won’t hit you the wrong way. Pick a drink that sends the massage you want - I used to drink whiskey so I’d get a bourbon neat - if it was a fully stocked bar I could pick a good one and talk to other lawyers/coworkers about it. Gin and tonic or glass of wine is also a fine option. If you’re a beer person go beer.

Idk what you mean by “how festive is too festive” but for clothes: Just dress business casual unless there is a dress code otherwise; for instance, my company has a party coming up that’s “cocktail” attire so suit or blazer and slacks for men. But Christmas parties are usually business casual depending on venue so I wouldn’t overthink it.

likesmart

I don't drink either. I tend to nurse a ginger ale and nobody has ever seemed to notice. What to wear is harder. Might be worth asking someone friendly at work what they wear.

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2-4 drinks per hour is always a good pace

likefunny

Anything less is rookie numbers in this racket

funnylike

Diet Coke.... Drink all you want. Go out later with friends.

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Personally i think 2-3, with some food, is the sweet spot

like

Generally, most people can safely metabolize one drink an hour, especially if there’s food and you alternate alcohol with water. Or, there’s the old standby of club soda with lime, which looks like a gin and tonic or vodka soda in the right glass.

But also, people care way less about your alcohol consumption than you think. I’ve gone through periods of being sober, and nobody cares. Even when I’ve gone back to drinking and I’m around people who know I drink alcohol, taking a “night off” doesn’t raise eyebrows. If anybody asks to get you a drink, just saying “Nah, I’m not drinking tonight” without some broader explanation will suffice. People don’t drink for lots of reasons - calories, health/medical reasons, religious/personal, etc. But if you do want to enjoy a little social libation but keep it in check, then one-drink-an-hour is a nice guideline.

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Don’t get drunk at the main event. If there’s an after party with friends have some fun, but don’t get belligerent.

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Do NOT pregame. Spoken from someone who has witness associates do it for some reason and reaaaaally tank their reputations with the partners haha

cold approach the paralegal and tbe partner

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