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Men, if they are chivalrous, and make it clear ahead of time if you are not going to.
This. All about communication.
The man but I try to be reasonable...order the least expensive drink and/or meal if dinner.
No second date if he at least doesn't even offer to pay.
Enthusiast
Maybe I’m old fashioned but I’m all about the good ole chivalry. I think it should always be the guy 🤷🏻♀️
I’m a 44-year-old female with some old-fashioned views. While I appreciate when a guy pays for the first date, I’m perfectly fine with covering the cost on a second date. After that, it makes sense to have a conversation about how to handle expenses for any future dates or activities.
The man but that's my personal preference. In previous relationships I've felt that I wasn't being taken care of - many times I've had to pay for my own meals and pay for him. This time around - it's a big red flag if a man doesn't pay. To me it means they can't take care of me.
In nearly all my past relationships, the guy would pay for our dates. Every so often, I’d pay for drink or dinner( mainly on trips). That said, we also would have a lot of dates at my place ( ~ 3 days a week).
I was the one going to the store, paying for the groceries, and cooking. Providing groceries for breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, dessert, etc. So I think it’s perfectly fair when he pays when we’re out.
The man and why would a woman ask anyway?
Struck a nerve I guess lol
Enthusiast
The man, always. I’m not going to order like crazy just to spend his money, stay reasonable like others have said. Dutch will be no second date.
I think it should either the person who asks for the date or we go dutch.
Ideally, I would agree with SC1 & MM1. I personally would prefer picking up the check. However, there are women out there that take advantage of this. I would say maybe do just drinks on the first date rather than a full meal. Helps you gauge and weed out ‘Gold diggers’. And if you find yourself with a girl who is expecting you to pay, then she doesn’t get to pick the place. Go to a place that doesn’t break bank.
Rising Star
Normally the guy, but I have had unsuccesful dating experiences where the guy paid for everything for 5/6 dates incl. expensive restaurants and others where we split the bill on the 1st date and they were lovely and dated him for long time. I appreciate if he pays but it's not a dealbreaker
As a woman, I never pull out my wallet for the first date. I always assume the man will pay. If he doesn't pay, it means he's not the one for me.
First date, if you are attracted to the person asking or being asked, the guy should offer to pay. If it is just a friendly kind of date then go dutch. You don't want to make a bad impression on the first date. You may not get a second.
Here’s what I’m learning in my mid 40’s. If your standard is for the man to pay then that is your standard. If you honestly don’t care and are great with splitting the bill then that is your standard too.
It doesn’t matter what’s popular at the time or what 20 million people say. If you feel loved when a man pays then that is what the person needs to do in order for you to be loved.
If you are fine splitting the bills then the person needs to be ok with not paying for everything. In the end you will find the person you are supposed to be with as long as you listen to your inner voice.
Well said. It’s like an staying in person VS going clubbing person, no right or right but fit
I think it should be whoever asked the other person out. Traditionally, I, as a woman, would not initiate the person date so I expected him to pay. Of course if the feelings are there, I can initiate the second date and pay
You pay for your own food, but if I have to pick one, then the guy
split if does not want the 2nd date.
a man if wants the 2nd date.
Dutch.. if we don't click no hard feelings.