I was approached by a girl my ex is dating (I assume) on facebook asking red flags 🚩 etc. I don’t really think it’s my position to share. What doesn’t work for me (and trust me it really doesn’t) might not be an issue for other people. Thoughts?

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Posting as :
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Yeah I’d ignore that message. If there was something really bad that happened (like he had a secret wife or stole money from you) I’d feel differently but run of the mill relationship stuff isn’t worth wading into. Not your monkey not your circus anymore.

likesmart

If it was anything such as cheating or abuse, I would spill the beans. Otherwise I would just say that things just didn't work out

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Cheating and emotional abuse are red flags that you should communicate.

Physical / emotional safety and trust are cornerstones of a relationship, and it sounds like this guy doesn't enable any of these things. OP, I say this with absolute love, you deserve someone who gives you that - stop excusing these things as unimportant.

Someone with more confidence isn't going to have a successful relationship with him because they can 'deal with it better', they will just leave him sooner and not put up with it.

If you're not comfortable declaring it emotional abuse, simply communicate my therapist commented that he was emotionally abusive.

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Say obviously jokey green flags:

• Repairs things too quickly
• Massive D; too big
• Makes too much money

funny

• Too charming
• Too rich

The D … 🤔

funny

Hahahahaha- this happened to me! Somehow she got my number and texted me. I just wrote back that dude is really fun but not a fully functioning grown up and we weren’t a good fit.
But I fully agree with your sentiment. It was weird that she reached out to me but I think I shouldn’t have responded at all. Nothing came of it- I was already 100% out of his life and in a new city. Never heard from either of them again.

If you see really dark red color flags, I am carrying a bright Green - feel free to get in touch sweetheart. 🤷‍♂️😊

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