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Posting as :
works at Avanade
▸ Consulting Memes
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Visual Storyteller

We have all been victims of this...

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likefunnysmart
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works at
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Deloitte 1
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Project managers who live and die by the book and all things Jira are truly terrible

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a Consultant 1
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Literally I wish my PM understood this.

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a Data Scientist 1
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I'm convinced that all these over-planning things just exist to make insecure CFOs comfortable

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Publicis Sapient 1
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💯
If anything agile produces less planning, not more. If you are planning more than a sprint or two out, what’s the point? That’s wasted effort.

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Capital One 1
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Enthusiast

We do it all for the ceremonies. Recognize and celebrate often!

likefunny
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an Engagement Manager 1
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I need to find a way to use UTTERLY DERANGED in a conversation at work now. Thanks!

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a Manager 1
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No one “does” agile. Most likely you aren’t agile if this is the result. And most companies who think they are “doing” agile are the least successful ones.

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Pen icon, author badge Author works at Avanade
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Visual Storyteller

The worst is when you're part of multiple project and have to deal with this times X 😭

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Publicis Sapient 1
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Go read the Agile Manifesto and the Phoenix Project.

Splitting people across projects or teams is probably the single biggest cause of inefficiencies.

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a Director 1
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Yes. A million times yes.

Whenever people proudly pronounce themselves Agile certified, I just assume they are a garden variety cherub.

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a Director 2
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Enthusiast

Yeah man #FJB

smart
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Accenture 1
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I once asked my “agile certified scrum master” if we could repurpose the demo time because we had nothing to demo yet. She wouldn’t let me bc she said it would confuse the clients. I’m like look lady these people are smart enough to know meeting slots can be repurposed

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Strategy& 1
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Not in tech here but I always thought agile was really a marketing term to get billable hours kicked off sooner and lock in the work

Related Posts

Posting as :
an Associate Creative Director
▸ creative
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Can we please be done with vertical video? It’s completely opposite the human field of view, looks horrible, no camera other than a cell phone shoots it. Seriously dreading IGTV.

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Posting as :
works at Salesforce
▸ Other (non-Software)
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I don’t know even know what I’m good at anymore.

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Posting as :
a Senior Consultant
▸ Healthcare
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Trying to do some initial research on laptops for business school and trying to determine if a new Mac book pro could be used at Wharton (or honestly any school!) for finance (not quant finance major though!)

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Posting as :
works at Amazon
▸ Marketing
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Does anyone know what it's like for EA's @ MongoDB?

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a Data Scientist
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Does anyone have any insights on what Data Scientists earn in the Denver area?

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Posting as :
works at Accenture
▸ Strategy
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Pro

Jummah Mubarak Fam ☪️💚

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Posting as :
works at Cognizant
▸ Strategy
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What CTC should one ask for Senior Consultant at Capgemini Invent..6 YOE.

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works at Cognizant
▸ Technology
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a Senior Associate
▸ advisory
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Seeking recommendations. What firm would allow for the most variety in the type of work I do? For example being on projects for different types of teams like data privacy, cyber security, & strategy?

Posting as :
works at Antler
▸ Venture Capital
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Anyone know of any early stage VC’s or Early-Stage Start-Ups / Scale-Up opportunities in Europe? Preferably UK/Nordic/ Netherland region ! All the best out there

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an Associate
▸ Financial Advisors
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Considering making the move from distressed investing/special situations to consulting, particularly pe consulting for the following reasons: more team-oriented, structured career path, more variety, etc. Thoughts?

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a Public Relations Manager
▸ Music
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Those in music comms: what are the best labels/agencies to work at?

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Posting as :
an Associate Consultant
▸ Healthcare
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I have a trinity offer for 25% more total comp than ZS. @trinity folks- how do you like the company? Should I make the switch?

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Posting as :
works at HCL Technologies
▸ Strategy
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Hi folks
Joined birlsoft lastweek

Please let me know how to declare and modify medical details of dependents

How to apply for WFH kit like table chair?

Whwn we can declare flexi

funny
Posting as :
a Software Engineer
▸ Strategy
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Is April month salary slip generated in FIS Global ??? Mine is not showing, when it will generate?
I doubt they didn't give me quarterly variable , I joined in mid February and even salary came less than previous month.
Did they deduct tax in April month salary of it is then fine because they didn't tax in March month .

Kindly comments if anyone have idea .

Thanks

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Posting as :
works at Accenture
▸ Technology
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After decades of system iterations can someone please answer me the question of why I have to build the same general customer master data report because SAP refuses to have a standard transaction for it?!? Just me venting, carry on :)

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Posting as :
a Senior Associate
▸ Technology
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I wish I had someone to cuddle with in this beautiful white weather! 😢 (for context: 29M)

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Posting as :
a Senior Manager
▸ Technology
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Visual Storyteller

Not every person in the comments saying how great of a parent they are

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Posting as :
works at Mindtree
▸ Engineering
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today my joining in Hexaware Technologies but still they not send revised offer and onboarding mail

they told today will sent

what should i do now?

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Posting as :
works at Deloitte
▸ Strategy
You are currently posting as works at Deloitte

Guys, need your help. I have cleared technical and managerial round for Big4 Netherland. How much should I ask as pay for Manager position? What's the average pay there?
PS- I don't have any previous overseas exp.

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Additional Posts in Consulting Memes

Posting as :
a Consultant
▸ Technology
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Sounds about right

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likefunny
Posting as :
works at Deloitte
▸ Technology
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Hoping everyone’s safe and still employed!

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likefunny
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a Partner
▸ Technology
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Wow! McKinsey, what next?

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likesmartfunny
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a Managing Director
▸ Healthcare
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Conversation Starter

Happy Wednesday. It is Wednesday right?

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likefunny
Posting as :
works at EY
▸ advisory
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When you want to capitalize on all the perks

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likefunny
Posting as :
works at Deloitte
▸ human capital & hr consulting
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Conversation Starter

Making Asses Clean Again

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likefunnysmart
Posting as :
a Consultant
▸ strategy
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Do it, I dare you. 😑

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funnylike
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works at PwC
▸ advisory
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Mcbee can you turn this car full of trash into a meme?

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likefunny
Posting as :
a Manager
▸ strategy
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Happy Thursday 🐠

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likefunnysmart
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works at EY
▸ Strategy
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Please do not show to client before Partner review!

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likefunny
Posting as :
works at PwC
▸ advisory
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Sometimes when two memes collide, the results are annoying. (Sourced from the grams).

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likefunny
Posting as :
an Associate
▸ law
You are currently posting as works at Associate

WFH has been going swimmingly 😎

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likefunnyhelpful
Posting as :
a Manager
▸ advisory
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What's the best way to describe building and delivering technical proposals (i.e. business development work) and make it sound fancy for non-consulting firms?

Question is inspired by the "changing a light bulb" consulting meme.

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Posting as :
works at EY
▸ strategy
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Deloitte OP is an imposter 🐝

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likefunnyuplifting
Posting as :
a Senior Consultant
▸ healthcare
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When you’re remote, but the rest of your team is in the client city together doing dinners and hanging out

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likefunnyuplifting
Posting as :
a Managing Director
▸ strategy
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Heads or Tails?

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likefunny
Posting as :
works at Accenture
▸ Digital
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Kinda feel the same way when writing a business proposal, then defending it.

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likefunny
Posting as :
a Senior Consultant
▸ strategy
You are currently posting as works at Senior Consultant

Working with a useless manager be like

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likefunnysmart
Posting as :
works at PwC
▸ strategy
You are currently posting as works at PwC

Why is Deloitte screwing up this bowl with idiotic memes?

likeupliftingfunny
Posting as :
works at Accenture
▸ strategy
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Conversation Starter

Thank you Shannon for being a wonderful team lead

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likefunny

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