After my final interview, I made a well-researched counteroffer backed by industry benchmarks. The recruiter seemed uncomfortable and said they'd "get back to me soon." That was 10 days ago. Is it safe to say I blew it and move on?

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You might have countered your way out of the job, but you'll never know unless you ask. Send a followup email and see what they have to say. Either way, this says a lot more about them than it does you. Negotiating pay is the standard. If their response to a reasonable counter offer is radio silence, good riddance. Don't let it keep you from negotiating your next offer.

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I don’t think it was blowing it if you brought a reasonable and realistic number. It’s not our fault that we’d like to be paid fairly, and companies seem to be trying to find the lowest number possible.

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Unfortunately yes, it's likely they aren't coming back with a counter offer. In this job market, a lot of companies are treating salary offers as a take it or leave it situation. There will always be an experienced candidate willing to work for less.

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