Anyone else hate being a working mom in a dual career household?

Nope!! So glad I am a working mom in a dual career household. I have great household infrastructure though - a spouse who genuinely shares family workload (e.g., I have never taken a kid to the doctor or dentist), an amazing nanny/household manager and a weekly cleaning service).

No, I don’t hate it. Is it incredibly difficult? Yes. Are there days I dream about alternatives? Yes. Realistically though… I can’t imagine not working. And while I may be frustrated with certain times, I don’t *hate* it.

It also helps to look at the benefits for my kids of what it mean to grow up in a household with a working mom. Lots of statistics about outcomes that are aligned with what I want for my kids. It helps!

I’m sure lots of women do. Society over the past 50 years sold a lie that career was more important than family, and then forced both parents to work full time (in most families). It’s no wonder we have so many issues today with the youth. Not to mention the frequency of high risk births with mothers at advanced maternal age and fathers with fertility issues and birth defects/disabilities caused by their advanced age.

I just want to retire and bake bread tbh

Yeah. I'd rather have a stay at home husband.

Yes, I think many women would choose not to if it wasn't forced. I wish most families could do well on one income, but you have to be relatively rich to afford staying home with your kids.

I do and I don’t. I would never give up my independence or financial freedom. My husband was supposed to be more of a partner. We discussed division of labor before we got married. That is not what’s happening in practice, and he doesn’t seem to care to rectify it. I’m sure I’ll get comments about how I should’ve picked better or I should try harder to explain things to him🙄. Please save it people, it’s not helpful.

I never came from a family with a full-time “stay-at-home” mom. I come from reams of ancestors who both worked in a variety of capacities. Same for my spouse. I think the myth of the stay-at-home mom was only true for a small slice of any population, but because that population got most of the airplay and attention, it made it seem like a much wider practice than it really was. Otherwise moms were raising kids while also having a job, or jobs, while doing laundry / cleaning homes / sewing / childminding / laboring, etc. for the wealthy. Careers for/working moms, self included, has always been a thing.

I was a stay at home mom for 10 years before I went back full time 5 years ago. I’m so happy to be working again. While I loved the time with my kids, I was missing that drive. Plus, I’m happy that I’m also bring in income and not relying on my husband.

Tbh I love having a dual career household. My kids are super proud of what I do and feel like I’m setting a great example for my boys, I communicate more with my husband about what I want and need (which helps for career and personal conversations) and it helps me prioritise and be better at my job for setting boundaries. As a North American living in the UK I think that the gender norms here are about a decade behind what I was used to - but that’s what makes it more important than ever to be on the pitch :) good luck out there parents

Not at all. I’m not built to be a stay at home mom. I learned to be more realistic and we positioned our family to be more efficient for me and the kids. My husband is very supportive and understands what my career means to me.

I planned my education and career before I planned a marriage. I love that I can be an example of self-sufficiency and interdependence for my kids. I admire SAHMs. I just prefer to work.

Sometimes it’s harder than others, but I hated it a lot more when I had my oldest in daycare. I switched to a mostly work from home job and have a nanny who watches my children during the day. Instead of driving them to daycare in the morning, I wake up and get them ready and then play and make them breakfast. If I have a light day, I eat lunch with them, or I spend 20 mins holding the baby or playing with the toddler. My oldest has some special needs and I want both my kids to go to private schools (all of which costs money), so when I think about why I’m still working - to give them the best life I can - it’s an easier pill to swallow and easier to find the joy.

I hate being a working mom period. I waited until I was more secure financially and professionally to have kids and now I feel like I’m missing out on so much. And I get zero alone time to pursue my own interests and passions. I’d love to be independently wealthy and not have to work.

I just find it hard. I’m constantly dropping the ball somewhere, usually with kids. Sometimes I forget to make them dinner or book a babysitter when I’ll be away. It’s a lot of logistics. (For context: first time back to work after a long mat leave with my second. So first time working with 2 kids).

Sole breadwinner here as a consulting manager (definitely wouldn’t consider myself “rich”) with multiple young kids and a SAH spouse. It can be definitely be done - honestly most people in our profession don’t “need” two incomes to support a family.

I was a working mom for most of it. I worked and went to college when my kids were babies/toddlers. When I finally got my degree they were both in school and I was able to take a few years off to stay home as my ex started a business. But I honestly needed to have something for myself and was able to get back to work when they were 6 and 10 years old. Honestly, once they were teenagers I kept thinking how that would've been the best time to SAHM - the little ones are easy, the teens need supervision, lol. Unfortunately by then I was divorced and had to work.