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Hi fishes, I have a total of 4.5 yrs exp with 3 yrs in COBOL JCL, DB2 development and 1 yr in COBOL JCL IMS development. I am working in Bank of America looking for roles outside. Please provide any referrals or leads.
Thanks.
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I have felt this way many times in my career as a nurse and even as an NP. These feelings are partly trained within you as a result of years of hard training. When you’re trained to fight death for a living humility is paramount. When human life is on the line and fighting disease is the enemy we know that there are only finite chances we have to get it right.
Realize that it’s not you. It’s society. It’s the system around you. It’s the realization that fighting death and disease as a lifelong career isn’t something that often gets enough praise and kudos.
Some of it is built into the profession for the sake of protecting its unique art form and one that makes the science of nursing constantly critiqued.
How could anyone be a good clinician truly when we do our best but we don’t always get it right? If death in the end and illness can still take their toll we can’t celebrate accomplishment. Cheering to much and we get soft.
It goes further. A culture exists where it’s a standard to sacrifice all of ourselves for the cause. Sick people need us. It’s a broke system so deal with poor staffing and high risk situations and if nurses eat their young this is ok and acceptable.
No. It’s not ok.
Realize that these feelings you have are a normal result of your training and the systems you work in that are broken. It’s hard to feel validated for what you do when you work in a broken system that demands constant checks and balances, knowledge improvement and humility. You are not a bad clinician. You’re a real nurse. We need you.
I am still trying to learn this myself and I have 3 degrees in Nursing.
Our profession has been the ones to take the arrows to try to mend a broken health system and the cost goes beyond financial reasons.
The cost is burn out. Mental health. Lack of confidence. Etc.
Because the truth is nursing school only teaches you where to find the information you need to save a life and fight disease.
Nothing can truly teach you how to be a nurse.
Expect and understand that a weak man is hard on others. A strong man is hard on himself.
You know the cost the enemy you fight can take. He isn’t always forgiving. Disease will do what it will do.
You begin to feel grounded in your practice when you start to realize that really no one has it figured out like they say they do.
Put your care for patients first above all other feelings.
Understand you will make mistakes but that doesn’t make you a bad clinician.
A good clinician recognizes the vast library of work it takes to continue to fight the enemy of death and disease.
It’s a goalpost that is always moving and changing and evolving.
How can anyone feel safe or solid in a profession where the enemy you battle constantly requires your best with sometimes very little self awareness of what that best is?
It takes guts to walk up to death and say “hey I think in some situations I can stop you for awhile.”
Who wouldn’t feel inadequate?
It’s ok to have those feelings.
You picked a fight with a lion choosing this profession.
But the cool part is having graduated you have it in you to beat him.
In many of George Washington’s journals he spoke a lot about how inadequate he felt to the task during his winter stay at Valley Forge. Soldiers were dying and he picked a fight with the most powerful military in the world. He convinced some rag tag colonial farmers that we had a shot to be free.
He was stoic. He didn’t outwardly let his soldiers know many of these feelings but his journal and letters to his wife reveal a very human man unsure of success.
Be proud of what you have accomplished. Out there in the hospital it’s a war zone. If you let doubt take over he can and will beat you to the ground.
You must go in every day with a focus of “I’m going to do the best I can, and good or bad at the end of the day that will be enough.”
It will be easier said than done. But ground yourself.
Plant your feet like a tree with roots.
Hold the line. Know your worth.
Take each day one day at a time.
What you’re feeling is normal and a part of the training you have experienced.
Feel it. Recognize it.
Then say to yourself
What am I going to do about it?
Do
My best?
Or let my lack of confidence win?
Focus on one day at a time.
There will be days that crush you.
But there will be days that you can say
Today I made the world a better place.
It starts with you.
Feet planted into the earth.
Recognize your worth.
Understand even the greatest people in history felt fear.
Those people you admire were not super human Gods. They were human
Just like
You.
Trust in the path of light my friend.
Your normal.
You’re not an imposter.
You’re working in a system that wants you to be superhuman and solve everything.
You can’t.
When you realize this and love your patients
This is when you become truly free.
Grounded in your profession …
And in the end you can show the world that nurses can fight lions
And win.
Amazing encouragement!
I think we all have a little bit of imposter syndrome honestly. Self-talk does help but I feel like over time the better you get at your job, the more it subsides.
I really hope so! Learning new things every day
Subject Expert
I think we all do this let’s face it just becoming a nurse. We worked hard for this so never take that for you know granted and always realize what you went through to become a nurse and how you are here today that’s not easy work if so, everybody would do it
That is so true. I just wish the more senior nurses on the unit would remember that and give me some grace when I’m asking questions.
I’ve been a nurse for 20 years and I still feel like I’m lying when I tell people what I do. Wicked imposter syndrome. I’ve been at my current job for 6.5 years and think I’ve only just figured out how to do my work, like, last week.