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I feel your pain by just reading your post. I'm sorry you're going through this, but I hope in time, your decision to split with this man will help you improve in a lot of areas of life. I think in such a situation the best way to survive is to really prioritize talking to someone whether it's therapy a sane person in the family or a great friend. I don't think you should be left alone in all the murkiness. Also, your ex has his own support systems and ways to deal with his pain. Please just focus on yourself.
I am wondering if this was a mutual decision, or initiated by either of you, if it was him who initiated it then no point of feeling pitty for him or yourself you only live once and you can cry picking up the pieces but don’t let that soften you, focus on future and it’s possibilities.
If it was you who made the choice or mutual, the rules are same. Why feel anything but happy about making your own choices and decisions.
In my case my husband initiated it, and I didn’t say no if one is stupid and want to make a choice that make them regret it later that’s not my spilled milk to clean, since then I have seen so much hardship alone I never looked back this is my life and I am in control whether it is going up the hill or down. Live free live for yourself ( I also did not have kids so this outlook came easy to me) but I understand some of us have more to think about either way the answer is same, move on and move strong! You can do this!! And I wish you all the happiness and strength to do it!
My advice is do your best to not concern yourself with how he is feeling about this if you’re getting the divorce and not reconciling than your priority needs to be you and only you (and children if applicable)
therapy
Obviously therapy but visualize the life you want too. If you left him, have 1-3 statements that clearly and concisely reminds you why. If he left you and you wanted to reconcile, have 1-3 statements that clearly conveys the forward looking life you want to build and helps you look at it like a new adventure rather than leaving something behind