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I have before. I’m one of those when I get stressed and my blood pressure spikes I can’t stop myself. So unfortunately it’s happened a few times.
I had a manager when I was dealing with some discrimination issues and I cried he was very kind and understanding. He seemed to understand we are human and things sometimes lead to an emotional response. He, to date, has been the best, most supportive and kind leaders I’ve had. He never thought less of me or if he did I never saw it.
Your results may vary.
That’s the truth.
Don’t do it. Go cry in your car.
Stop the meeting and probably walk miles to have a cry, you might as well finish it in there, and carry on with the the conversation.
When it first happened to me as am manager, I honestly didn't know how to react or how to think about it. My first reaction being a relatively new manager was to console the employee and then in the back of my mind, I was thinking, "You shouldn't be crying at work!"
But now as a more seasoned leader, I feel very comfortable with it. It's totally human. I actually think it's great when someone is willing to be vulnerable with me. Shows a lot of trust. I don't expect people to show up as their best everyday. Again, we are human. Some much can be happening outside of work as well. Giving each other grace is important - esp as a leader.
That being said, part of being a leader is having a certain level of equanimity and calmness. I do think many great leaders are steadfast, but every now and then, showing your emotions in its rawest form is healthy and acceptable.
Personally no, some things in my eyes you just should not do at work. With that being said it depends on how much you actually trust your management. Go in the bathroom or your car if you need to let it out.
Depends on the leader in question. If this happened with anyone in my team, or any other colleague really, I'd probably send them home for the day and see if there's anything in my power that I can do to help. We also have mental health first aiders and confidantes who might be of help.
But it's a company culture thing too, in a shitty company you'll probably be told to act like a man or even made fun of.
My ultimate feedback from leadership to my rage tears: that's a form of terrorism, you are attempting to hold me hostage with tears. If I don't stop speaking you'll keep crying.
Man what a brutally honest approach. And yes considered abusive in this day and age but helped me understand the reason for the tears.
Rage? Anger? Frustration? Embarrassment? Hormones? Glucose levels?
Our jobs changed on acceptable abuse levels from customers when the pandemic hit. But here's the thing: if you haven't learned how to separate your personal value from your work value then you need to do some serious self reflection.
Our bosses aren't our friends or family or therapists (your benefits should cover that). Is it something leadership can change or are you looking for a comrade in arms that can commiserate with you about the experience?
Be unstoppable where they can see you. Don't show weakness: show humour and yes cry in the car, or the bathroom, or smoking area. Figure out what's prompting it and find a solution to change it.
Agreed. I have had legitimate toxic environments where you look around and have to shake your head that this is actually how grown ups are behaving. Good luck with it! Took 2 years of a reorg for me to get back into a position of trust and some serious therapy 🤣.
So... not alone? 😉
I definitely did once and I ended up apologizing later for getting emotional and she reassued me that it happens to the best of us. Honestly sometimes these things happen and there is no shame in it. We are humans and we have emotions.
Whelp I didn’t break down in my bosses office but in front my daughter.
Rule of life 103: don’t play indoor soccer against your travel team daughter on hardwood while wearing socks. I think i might need an ER.
I have not, but I am guy and internalize everything so probably not the best person to ask. 😅
I did many years ago have a female employee tell me she was told to stop dressing like a slut. And understandably there were tears and no I never held it against her.
I also had a female staffer on a contract I was leaving as the PM lose her baby call and Teams cry for a good 30-40min. I was rather touched she felt she could confide in me.
It’s incredibly sad some of you think you have to hide in a bathroom. I get why. Assholes exist but they shouldn’t.
Yes, and he kept going forward with the meeting as if I wasn’t hysterically crying. It was bizarre honestly. I felt like all he cared about was holding his meeting with me so that he was “doing his job.” Our job picks us apart and crying unfortunately happens and tons of reps go out on stress leave. It’s not healthy. The company tries to squeeze every ounce of productivity out of us at our expense. I find I cry more when I don’t speak up for myself which also backfires so my advice is to just try to survive.
I've felt like it before, never actually done so though. I'd like to think leadership would take a charitable view of it and understand how stressed and burnt out I am, but I doubt that'd actually be the case.
Don’t do it if you can help it.