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She will also tell the team that she loves us. Which to me is a boundary that shouldn't be crossed. I get some people can be friends with coworkers, but I honestly don't like being friends with a supervisor, likewise when I supervise somebody I don't want to be their best friend either. I understand wanting to be supportive and friendly, but I feel like sometimes things go too far. The only line I have been able to firmly draw is the no hugging one, because I don't feel the need to hug all of my coworkers all of the time. I think it's weird. I honestly just want to do my job, and go home. I like being part of the team, and we have a good rapport, but I don't want to push it too far. And I certainly don't want to hang out after hours, and talk about work even more.
We are allowed as human beings to set our boundaries and say no to whatever we don't feel comfortable with. Saying no politely is not rude. It helps you centre yourself and allows you to live your life the way you wish it to be. Stay the course. Don't feel guilty or feel the need to cave in. You can do this!
That’s a tough situation to be in. Because you have a right to set boundaries however it sounds like your career is going to be tied to how well she likes you personally. Is she just lonely in her life? So she tries to make friends with everyone she works with? It’s a little sad.
I use to have a boss like this, they make their job their whole personality. I think you're doing all the right things. Just keep politely saying, "no" unfortunately women like this can get very angry and possibly vengeful if you outright tell them you don't want to be friends. If she understands you have a family, or pets to care for, she might start to back off. Sorry this is happening to you, it's so inappropriate.
Have you ever watched the movie "The Intern?" That should give you some ideas about what the boss and the employee are, and use it as a somewhat guide to what the limits of the boundaries you want to point out to the employer.