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In terms of retaliation from manager, it really depends on your boss and the culture of your firm, but short term disability is not though your medical insurance (regardless of the reason). It can be for a medical reason and the STD firm may request documentation from your therapist or doctor to sign off on it, but that information is protected by HIPAA and legally couldn’t be disclosed to your manager/firm.
Depending where you’re located, there may also be paid family leave which is something mandated by some states (MA and NY have it, both states I’ve lived in, but not sure about others). This is different than STD.
As far as retaliation from your firm, that would be illegal but you would need to prove it (similar to maternity leave, your role is protected and they can’t back fill you for going on STD). The one person I know who did this was a coworker of my best friend. From my friend could tell, they did not suffer in the work place… maybe held back slightly in promotion relative to others but she missed a pretty significant amount of time.
Depending on your relationship with your manager, I would be professional (don’t over share) but honest about the challenges you’re experiencing so they can understand and hopefully be sympathetic. Before you go in and ask for it, review your firms STD insurance policy and understand the terms and limits of it (length of time at full pay, length of time at partial pay). Connect with therapist/dr to make them aware you make need supporting documentation so they have a heads up. They likely have supported other patients through this and can support you. Hope things turn around for you soon.
You shouldn’t have to disclose your medical reasons for taking STD to your manager only to the disability company.
I think we’ve come so far in terms of the issue of mental health. In the past, mental health issues were never ever discussed due to the mounting stigma and overall judgement one might feel. Now, admired athletes withdraw from competition due to their mental health issues. One in 4-6 ppl suffer with anxiety and/or depression. Take your STD under a mental health diagnosis. If you do not take time for yourself, you might regret it. Good Luck!