I’ve turned off all work notifications on my phone and I consciously do not check my work email after I log off at night but I’m incredibly anxious when I start in the mornings. I am absolutely terrified to open my email. My anxiety tries to convince me that my boss fired me over email between the time I signed off yesterday and the time I’m starting this morning. I know that it is ridiculous but I can’t shake the nerves. Do any of you feel this way? I’m in therapy and taking anxiety medication.

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Work out what your boundaries are and stick to them. Really, what is the worst consequence at your level? Getting fired? Senior attorneys with real experience can always get a job.

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I used to worry irrationally about being fired, not quite to your level, but I did worry and had a hard time with the idea that someone might not be 100% happy with me if I ever asserted a boundary. At some point I think I just looked around at the people who were objectively not as good and yet remained employed, and I guess I just realized how irrational that thought process was. Also, as a senior attorney, your (and my) value-add is not 24/7 availability. It’s quality work, and you (and I) will get it done on time but not on-demand just because someone decides to fling an email at 10 pm.

Perhaps counterintuitive, but would it maybe actually help you to check email once at night before bed? You wouldn’t respond to anything non-urgent but I wonder if it would give you peace of mind that nothing is happening so you wouldn’t wake up quite so freaked out?

likesmart

If you don’t set the boundaries, others won’t respect it. (At least that’s what I’m trying to convince myself of lol). If it’s a true emergency, they can track you down. But it’s not.

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Do you work in an environment where immediate responses are expected because that’s what the client is paying for, i.e. real estate transactions? If no, then the response can always wait.

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I’m laughing because I’ve been doing CRE finance deals for over 20 years and have never seen the practice called out like that. Curious what makes them seemingly more urgent than other transactions??

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Just here to say same. New job dysregulation is very real but also setting boundaries makes you more respected nearly always if you do it reasonably and your work quality is high

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likesmart

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