There’s this weird tension between being polished and being authentic. I’ve had mentors tell me to be myself, but then ding me for not fitting the mold. How do you decide when to conform and when to push back?

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Your post equates polish with conformity and authenticity with resistance (push back). Perhaps you can play the middle ground by picking your battles , and when it’s time to speak up, think about doing so with a question and a suggestion. If you feel strongly that the mold should be changed, help by asking why and recommending a solution. Doing this all the time will be exhausting for you and your team, so pick your moments. Document your moments for your 1:1 . You become aware of the mold, and conform much of the time. And when you feel strongly, you ask a question about why it’s done such a way, and recommend an alternative solution, process, approach.

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Everyone says to be authentic to your self because it’s the current feel good buzzy term,but that authenticity still needs to fit into corp culture mold. Tshirt and hoodie person probably isn’t going to have a good time at a suit and tie company and vice versa

You be authentically your professional self, which is usually different then how you are everywhere else. Go along to get along.

You can be both

That tension is so real. A lot of workplaces say they value authenticity, but still reward a very specific version of it. I don’t think it’s about choosing one or the other all the time. For me, it’s been about learning where polish actually helps the message land and where staying true to myself matters more, even if it creates a little friction.

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