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Are you saying that you are your own worst enemy? I think most of us are. We get in our own heads, doubt ourselves, and even sometimes self-sabotage out of fear or self-loathing. I have tried to work on this for many years in therapy, but I definitely still see it play out in my life in various ways. Hope that you are able to find some inner peace soon!
I think this is a very common experience. And I do hope it disappears when you retire!! For this last year of work, I would just focus on trying to remind yourself that nobody is perfect, everyone has shortcomings, and most people can't see ours as well as we can. So just showing up and doing your best everyday is all anyone (including yourself) can expect