Has anyone else worked with a manager that’s difficult to get a gauge on whether you’re meeting expectations? Tiny actions suggest that he doesn’t really like me/gel with me. How does one cope with hard to read bosses where you constantly feel like you’re not doing enough to the point that I now have anxiety about my work and wondering if my head is first on the chopping block if time came. When asked for feedback I don’t get much constructive criticism.

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I’ve dealt with hands off managers and I’ve dealt with micromanagers. And tbh with you, the best feedback I typically get is from the people that I actually work directly with (stakeholders, delivery team, other product folks). If you’re doing a good job, then those people will make sure you know it and they’ll speak highly of you to others.

But of course, your manager is the one who you have performance reviews with and ultimately determines your bonus, raise, and/or promotion. So you have to “suck up” to them. I usually just mimic the level of engagement and personality type of my manager on my 1:1’s or interactions with them. Managers who see themselves in their direct reports tend to play favoritism with those individuals.

This is just based on my experience though. Not sure if this advice works all the time. But unfortunately you have to play this dumb game bc most managers are not that great at managing people.

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You say that when you asked for feedback you didn't get constructive criticism - did you get heavy criticism or light praise? Sometimes different managers communicate in a way that "no news is good news", while others give more direct feedback. It might be a good idea to have a conversation with him to jus explain how you learn best from more direct feedback.

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