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Rising Star
Never met a woman who regretted her divorce.
Statistically speaking, marriage primarily benefits men when it comes to happiness. Single/divorced women are happier and more free from not carrying the mental and emotional burden of a marriage.
Sure you are, AA1. What exactly are you hoping to achieve by your comments? Your framing is a “what aboutism” and mildly condescending, which to me indicates you are not in the loving communicative relationship you claim to be in. Also, whenever people claim to be in those relationships for the internet, it generally means they’re trying to convince themselves. As Atty 1 mentioned above, everyone has different life experiences which is what OP was asking about. Your comments aren’t that helpful for the topic at hand.
Absolutely cannot relate at all because my divorce is the best thing I ever did and I haven’t regretted it for one second 😂
My husbands aunt. Her ex was very into FIRE, and she didn’t like living frugally. He’s now retired early and living large. Dating has been harder than she thought it would be. Her son is now an adult and spends more time and holidays with his dad (dad has the bigger house, takes him on vacation, etc.). She ends up alone on holidays a lot. Her and her ex were really well suited. They just couldn’t get on the same page about finances.
My mother-in-law. She and my FIL went through a rough patch when my husband was in his early teens and they divorced. From what she’s said, there was nothing terrible - no abuse, no cheating, no financial shenanigans - just boredom and frustration. Looking back, she says the boredom was more a function of a midlife itch and dissatisfaction with her job, but at the time she attributed it to her husband. They divorced and she has said she’s been really lonely in the years since. She wanted to meet another man, but didn’t find anyone good, and her kids both moved across the country. She’s not doing terribly, but she does say she thinks if she’d held on during the bumpy patch, things would have smoothed out. She and my FIL are now on friendly terms, but he’s happily remarried and has firmly moved on.
I think the anecdotes of regret seem to be from women who then wanted to be married again (to the former or another partner). So one of the question might have to be would you be happy on your own.
Disclaimer: very happily single woman here
I think this is very true! Getting divorced because you think there is someone better out there might lead to regret. Getting divorced because you would rather be single than married to your current spouse probably does not lead to regret.
F
My first job in law was as a clerk in family court. A very prominent female family law attorney who was married to a male criminal law attorney finalized her divorce the very first week I was working there. She seemed to have it all together, looked happy as a clam and spoke of new bars and clubs she was going to with me - who she deemed was a young and somewhat in the know female. Just before I left family court, about a year after I started, she handed me a wedding invitation. I congratulated her and went back to my desk, opened it and she was marrying her ex! I later found out through the grapevine that she divorced because she married young and thought she needed the freedom. She got her freedom for 6 or so months and then regretted it. She went back to her "real life" as I am told she stated in her wedding vows. 20 years later and they are still together and about to welcome their first grandchild.