Related Posts
Hi fellow creatives! I’m looking for any and all kinds of creative people to participate in a research study!
www.creativitystudy.com
I’m a creativity researcher working on my dissertation on the psychology & neuroscience of creativity. I’m interested in understanding how different types of creative careers, side hustles, and artistic outlets relate to our emotions, mental health, & well-being. Ultimately to help build awareness, resources, & improve the lives of creative people.
Please visit www.creativitystudy.com for more info!
Conversation Starter
Enthusiast
Visual Storyteller
Conversation Starter
Timesheet software “update.”
Anonymous User
Rising Star
Additional Posts in Creatives
How is it working in house at Nike?
Are Creative Directors rich?
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
He will probably blame it on everything but himself. The company, lack of mentorship, capitalism, the industry…
You did the right thing. He will learn or he won’t.
I was Jr level not too long ago. The things that fellow Jr copywriters would do and say blew my mind. I do think Jr level talent needs a ton of feedback whether or not they are ready to hear it. No one wants to give feedback it’s either you have good instincts and self-awareness or you struggle.
Mentor
Never feels good to have to be the one to hold someone accountable. The feeling will pass.
You didn’t do anything. The junior did it to himself. 👍
I just read through the comments.
First off, this guy definitely needs to be taken down a peg.
Just want to point out that at every point you chose to clarify details, you used the phrases "he's 48" and "online college." While you were in the right, your defense paints a negative picture.
Now, the age thing I kinda get because, in context, it was a rebuttal to the 'young and dumb' defense. But watch your mindset. It's easy for ageism biases to creep in after experiences like these. Yes, hold him to a high standard, he is an adult. But just be careful about throwing around his age. You could put a target on your back, or unwittingly encourage ageism bias in others.
Similarly, the "online college" distinction could work against your credibility. While you probably hold it as a distinction of why you and he are not at the same level, holding this over someone's head kinda stinks. If it was good enough for him to pass the interviews, it should be good enough for him to receive professional courtesy.
Finally, let his actions stand on their own. Threats of violence are inexcusable in a professional environment. Speaking poorly of your employer? Talk about biting the hand that feeds you. This is easy, orientation-level, employee handbook stuff. You don't need to stand on his degree or his age to feel comfortable with making the call.
Maybe it's gone on too long and things are past redemption. But, if not, you can help be his advocate for turning it around. A wake-up call like this works very well alongside a mentor or guide who can pave the way forward. Recommend some resources on Emotional Intelligence or professional development. Show him that his attitude is what's getting in his way. Assert your position of authority by leading with compassion. He may not take it, but you can walk away knowing you did everything you could.
There's a difference between something being the OP's responsibility and being the responsible thing to do.
OP, as described in the post, does not appear to be in the position to directly influence whether this man keeps his job. Since that is one thing they cannot control, my suggestion was pointed toward alternatives.
Taking responsibility for coaching him is an option, not an imperative. But, it demonstrates leadership, and, if effective, potentially makes her situation more bearable.
The reality of life is that sometimes we have to be the bigger person, when someone else will not. Sure, it's not fair, and you could always sink to their level, but that seldom goes well, and it drags you down. When we rise to the occasion, despite circumstances or people that would work against us, we show maturity and create for ourselves more opportunity.
UPDATE if anyone cares.
So he was confronted and he exploded, calling the person who turned him in a liar but was mistaken about who that was which only made matters worse as he went off on that tangent. Then, when he realized he was wrong and that it was me he tried to backpeddal which didn't help either. In the midst of pleading his innocence he ended up telling on himself, smh. He made 2 very loud scenes and disappeared after 11 am. No one has seen him since. Management has assured me I did the right thing in coming forward but even so, I still feel for him.
So tomorrow he comes in to pick up his stuff and I am going to stay away for his benefit as well as my own.
You did the right thing!!
What did you do last Tuesday?
I met with HR and told them about my coworker's inappropriate language and outbursts. It just never felt like venting and it would take a while for him to calm down I must say. We arent friends, we don't have friendly talks, I just don't know why he thought it was ok to say that same phrase to me like that. I even told him what he said was extreme and unnecessary.
This person needs a wake up call. Sometimes giving people what they truly need is difficult and does not feel good. You feel the way you do because you have empathy. If you felt nothing (or worse, gleeful), you’d be just like this person.
Yes, and I've dealt with this type in the past. But this guy is 48, did a recent career pivot after attending online college, loves to brag about being top of his class...only thinks highly of his own work, desparaging that of others. But if you dare give him real feedback he can't handle it, so I feel like I'm constantly walking on eggshells. He's older than me so I know he hates that I'm above him, everyone knows he doesn't like women in charge.
He makes the office very uncomfortable in general, angry outbursts....one female he often says inappropriate things to wants to go to HR but came to me first, I told her to make a list of what he has said and going forward keep a record so she can go to HR with specifics since she doesnt have dates or times or anything. Shes been there longer and knows if you don't have that HR won't do anything.
Was he serious about wanting to punch the boss or just venting? Did you report it in good faith, or were you just sick of dealing with him and knew that would get their attention?
I’m not saying you are in the wrong but if someone vented to me and I reported it in (kinda) bad faith instead of having an honest talk with them, I wouldn’t feel great.
I did try to talk to him, you see, he would walk up or pull up a chair and open with that sentence like we were cool like that. Each time he said he wanted to punch her in the face, I asked what's wrong, and talked him down. Each time he would refer to an annual review that took place 2 MONTHS EARLIER, but acting like it occured 5 minutes ago.
The last time he said it he looked legit psycho kind of mad, face completely contorted, mouth pulled tight like a butthole. It made me uncomfortable and our boss was literally out of town for over a week at this point.
Like he's getting mad about something in the past and acting like its fresh, I don't even know what to think at this point but it definitely screams unstability.
This kid shoulda been fired long ago. Also a protection order for your boss is not out of the question.
I have to agree with you, also he's 48. (Graduated online college 2 years ago 🙄)
I rarely feel bad for shitty juniors and I never feel bad for shitty people.
Why do you feel like you’re in the wrong? Because nobody likes a snitch ❤️
😘
It never feels good to reprimand or put someone out of a job… but it’s your job and responsibility. Plus, as a junior, he’s learning a valuable lesson early in his career. Imagine if he continued to get away with it for another 5 years, just to fall from a much greater height.