Racism is making me feel incredibly insecure. My self esteem is taking a hit. I didn’t grow up rich and I’m suddenly in a rich white town on the west coast. I’m afraid to go inside luxury stores bec of the stares and treatment so I order curbside. I don’t go for walks around my neighborhood bec people don’t think I live here and I wave at neighbors and am ignored. I’m feeling miserable. Does someone have advice

My advice would actually be to embrace it. Now, obviously it sucks having to be the bigger person but what you’re doing right now is creating an opportunity for people to see Black people in their spaces and build a comfortability which works both ways right because once people start getting more comfortable with you being around, you in turn will feel comfortable around them. You earned that space, when you see people in there staring at you say good morning. When you walk into a store and they’re staring at you funny, say hi it always catches them off guard because then they want to say can I help you with something and then you say no I just noticed that you were staring at me so I figured I would say hello. All this is doing is forcing them to challenge their thought process.

Can you move??

When I first moved into my community, I was the only black woman, and at first it was kind of uncomfortable, but I actually don’t feel threatened by white people. But I would start staring them back in the face, and then I would start introducing myself not to have small talk, because that’s not my thing, but just to acknowledge, I see you looking at me.

Girrrl. Don’t let those racist fools intimidate you or run you away. From my experience, you should experience less judge looks at the upscale stores if you’re dressed nice. Unfortunately people of all races judge and most treat you better when you’re dressed up. Also, if they treat you bad at those stores, they don’t deserve your $$

Reading this is making me tear up, thank you 🙏🏾

Girl, where are you... I'll be in the LA region for the next week... let me help you walk around your hood and be your cheerleader!!!!!

Rise up! Same thing happened when I changed my zip code. You have to train yourself even go into one store. I was raised also multicultural. However you belong one step at a time. Go in stores even if its to buy a perfume. Years later still happens in certain neighborhoods. Don’t look for neighbors. Be kind & courteous. Racism is also fear. Clearly you moved so you belong. Dress presentable everywhere you go. Is this San Francisco? It also happens when you travel. Also buy a puppy that will help break the ice.

Transfer to the DC office. Best office imo (and I’m in NY)

I believe if I’m in a space I belong there and operate accordingly. Upscale retail,? all white male executive meeting? foreign country? I belong there and they are lucky to have me grace them with my presence. Once you realize that belonging starts within it gets much easier and thing’s usually turn out better.