Rude female coworker, condescending "U need to do this", "this is your job". She loves an audience and plays dirty politics. I don't report to her but she tries to tell me what to do. She forces me to invite her to my meetings and wont stop until i forward the invite. But then she disrupts my meeting with snarky remarks or tries to correct me or derail the conversation. What can I do? I'm considering quitting. My manager supports me but is not really strong(he is new as well).

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The key to this is that she is your “co-worker” not you manager or superior. Set up a 15-30 min meeting to directly address the issue and share your frustration with her micro-managing, be logical and provide examples for context, then follow up meeting with an email outlining your conversation. Then escalate to a meeting with your mgr / her mgr to try to re-address the conflict. Fight dirty politics with CYA HR dismissal tactics.

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If you feel she’s clearly outright in the wrong, cc in your respective managers in response to call attention to her overstepping.

Keep responses factual and without emotion. “As per our agreement on responsibilities, I’m working on abc as per the RACI…”

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If she’s not your boss say no and set up a meeting with her boss. Make sure you assess the political implications first though

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Ditto, what Director 1 said. Document everything and she can’t make you send a meeting invite. If you get tired of saying no just say ok and then don’t. Aggressively remove her if she gets someone else to forward or set up invites so that forwarding is not possible. You are likely going to have to show some strength here in order to get some change. Enlist your manager’s help and do some “managing up” to help your manager show some strength as well.

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Seems strange that someone would make extra work for themself. Maybe she doesn't have enough to do? I sure wouldn't want to be viewed as someone who doesn't have enough to do.

Thank you all for the input. Unfortunately our organization is run by people like her so her boss probably is like her. But I will still give it a shot. Also I realized that I don't have a boss with a backbone. He does not push back and I get it because he is trying to make a name for him(new hire). I'm being pulled into too many places and I just am unable to manage the workload. He will not hire more saying we don't have budget. But also will not decrease my work load.

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