Related Posts
More Posts
Conversation Starter
Bowl Leader
Conversation Starter
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
Sign Up to see all discussions
- Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
- Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
- Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
"" is an unusual email domain. If correct, please proceed to the next step
Messaging rates may apply
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
New to Fishbowl?
Download the Fishbowl app to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
Share
Embed this post
Copy and paste embed code on your site
Preview
Download the
Fishbowl app
Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile
Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl
Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl
Messaging rates may apply
First time dad and "leadership" doesn't want you to use your rightfully given paternity leave ... that's not leadership. You should be able to use as much time as you need with your baby.
Best of luck with everything and congrats. Hope everything goes well for you and your family
The dad in me wants to say take your leave, enjoy every second of it, and that partner is an ahole. But I think your wife is taking a good approach. It’s not going to be easy but WFH will provide you more flexibility to see how the first week goes at least and you can reassess from there. You don’t want anything drastic to happen with employment at this big life changing moment.
That being said the second things calm down, id definitely remember this and be ready to walk away from the company if the opportunity presented itself.
Thanks for the honest opinion and advice
Bench all of 2020 doesn’t sound great when you’re coming into a recession.
I’d ditch the pat leave, take a project and make sure I kick ass. You can take it later
Principal’s point is valid. You have to be careful about taking leave, because if you’re on the bench too long you have to worry about being let go. If you can ride out 12-18 months of unemployment then take the leave. I know this doesn’t sound “empathetic” but I wouldn’t fool around in today’s economic world- hopefully you can take it later
Hi all - just wanted to let you all know that we had the baby last week 😁😁
It’s a great feeling 👍🏻
I’m back to work already - life made easier by wfh. Let’s see how the next week and more go.
Will take the pat leave once things settle down a bit.
Thanks a ton for your advice, support and guidance.
Grats OP! Good luck.
I agree with Director 1. The partner is an ahole and putting you in a difficult position. WFH gives you a lot of flexibility. Make sure you’re taking things off your wife’s plate when you’re taking breaks at home. And leave that project the moment you have better options.
Is there a way to negotiate to take your leave at a later time? Position it as a sacrifice for the firm, but make clear that you want that time back at some point. It will be hard on your wife at first, but she may appreciate you jumping to support full time in a couple months when you free up
Ah, totally get it.
I just got back from pat leave and I echo the sentiments of fellow fish: it’s time consuming and draining and I’m not certain my wife (a real rockstar if I may say so myself) would have been able to manage alone.
That said, I’ve been worried the last weeks about my job, retaining health insurance over the next year etc. If you think you’ll be worried throughout leave about losing your job, I don’t think it’s worth it, especially if (a) your wife is on board w you working (b) she has at least *some* other support these first few weeks and (c) you can take the leave and offer support relatively soon.
This is a tough situation and I’m wishing you all the best. You sound thoughtful and kind and communicative w your wife. I’m confident you’ll make it through either way
Your wife needs you. She needs to heal. She needs support. A new baby - no matter how smooth a delivery - it is is a LOT of work. And you won’t get the lost time back. Your kid will not stay a newborn forever. Understand these are unprecedented times but that’s life. There is always something or the other going on. Family is always priority. Work can always wait. I’d take the maximum paternity you can take.
I suggest you think of the following. Take the first week or 2 off. No one who is a total asshole will be unforgiving of that. From there gauge it. Flex your work hours and when you get in a steady rhythm, take the pat leave. I would save it till people start going back to work, and back in public as I suspect we will see a huge rise in cases again. Will be comforting for you and the wife that you’re not in the middle of that shit. Good luck and congrats. I’ve got 4, it’s rewarding and quite frankly the hardest thing you’ll ever do.
You can jump on the project now and take the pat leave later, or you can tell the partner to get f’ed, but that usually doesn’t end well imo