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I’m pretty femme so, for me I have to constantly come out to people and I’ve kept it to myself at times. So I wouldn’t say that I pretend to be straight, but I just won’t speak about anything that may lead to it coming up to avoid the topic. It’s a privilege to be able to do that, I know, but sometimes my spidey sense starts to go off and I just feel more comfortable keeping it to myself
Unless someone has good gaydar, I don't think they'd pick up on it but I get concerned about being in situations where co workers are having small talk and if I'll be asked about my "boyfriend". I really want to connect with/make friends in the office but I can't help but feel like I'll be hiding a part of myself
I'm in a big city, generally very liberal I just get nervous about problems in the workplace even if they're relatively unlikely
I’m very straight presenting so I haven’t really had to actively pretend, but if someone asks me I honest about my bisexuality
OP, I had the same reservations about that when I started my job a few years ago. Like PWC1, I’m pretty femme and felt I’d be coming out for the rest of my life. I had an amazing hiring manager who I told after a few months and realized that it didn’t have to be a major bone of contention. Now I’ve been transferred to a few different groups and instead of making it a huge deal when I talk to people, I’ll just insert “oh my girlfriend and I” language and let people do with that what they will. I have yet, knock on wood, to encounter a negative response to that. Hope that helps and best of luck to you!
Most of the people I work with know because I’m involved in the local LGBT group, and I’ve never felt like I couldn’t say something. However, when I travel for work, other colleagues and clients don’t know, and I don’t mention it unless it’s brought up. But if it does come up in conversation, I don’t hide and have never felt I needed to or should’ve
OP do you feel like you’re in a region of the country or your office that you couldn’t connect/ make friends if “they knew”? Or you’d just rather them not?