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Coach
For out of hours messages can you persistently reply: I’m OOO, will catch you up when I’m back tomorrow. And then silence notifications
Mentor
Tough situation to be in! Can you ask your co workers what type of cadence they experience with the boss to see if this is “the norm” for the company? That may help you identify if this is micro management or over stepping boundaries with you.
Yes either he is a micro manager or likes you maybe? But either way, not good. I would leave if my boss did that. I hate when they start to bug you if not important. Or talk to him to let him know it bothers you when he keeps checking up. Almost like no trust
I can’t imagine not having a conversation with my CEO at least twice a week. If my insights on financial decisions isn’t being sought out I’m not the valued part of the team I should be in my role.
I don’t think a boss contacting on Monday and Thursday as that weird. Especially if you are working asynchronous hours. Respond when back on the clock. Asking about exams, although not being paid by work, is certainly work related.
Trust your gut but it doesn’t sound like it’s crossed a line yet.
As a fellow Director with 20+ years managing people, I agree with this sentiment. It sounds more like he’s being a good leader and making sure you are finding your feet. Asking about exams is a way to help show he cares about things other than work. If calling you on days off doesn’t sit well with you, then simply ignore the calls and then reply by email when you’re back at work. Managing people is a fine art these days. With so many generations and the anti work movement, it can be tenuous for even good leaders. My best advice: Always Assume Positive Intent.
To take my exam out of my annual leave. On Monday evening he texted me on my phone saying hope every is going okay. Then yesterday again he called me during my time off, I didn’t answer and he immediately texted me saying I wanted to check in to see how your week and exams went.
I find it weird as I’m doing my exams at my own expense and I’m taking time out of my annual leave to go to exams so my company is not involved at all. To note there is 15-20y age gap between us.
Is it weird that this is making me very uncomfortable?
You need to have a conversation with your manager and address this. Let your manager know that you notice that he keeps on checking in when you even on days your are in PTO. That it gives you the feeling that there is no trust and it also crosses your personal boundaries and this makes you feel uncomfortable. You can ask him then to not contact you on days off. As for work days you can inquire why he is calling and maybe suggest to reach out if you need anything. See how he responds and trust your gut feeling.
Important, use “I” messages when you speak with him about it and talk about observations, behaviors and what you feel. He may not be aware it’s coming across like this and just wants to be a good manager.
Thank you. Yea I thought the same. I’m okay woth him checking in because I do know that the previous person left a shit show before they left so if its lack of trust I understand it, not to say I should en treated like that cause its not my fault but I understand it.
The problem is they are very flexible, in terms of working hours, I log in when I want log off when I want, so I’m on the fence should I say anything, cause he can then take a turn and be completely on my back all the time and micromanage me
Coach
A direct approach is still best, as PUXD1 mentioned. But you could also try subtle “training” like not responding at all until you’re back, and then saying, “Yes, I had a good few days off. Is there a work issue you wanted to discuss?”
It doesn’t seem that weird to me. Maybe he is trying to show he cares? If you’re uncomfortable just don’t respond until the work day. If he doesn’t take the hint then give direct feedback like mentioned above
It sounds like your manager is trying to build a relationship. But I can see how it could be stressful or set expectations that you could be reached while on vaca or pto, so if that’s a concern I would just not reply. If he asks after you are back, I would simply say something along the lines of.. when I am work I am 100% but when I take time off I like to truly disconnect and take time to recharge.
Best of luck on your CPA exams!!
Thank you all for you comments and suggestions. Its been very helpful. I think this just happening to me for the fist time caught me off guard , all my managers in the past never really contacted me outside of working hours.
Thanks again