How much of your fertility journey did you share with your managers/mentors? 2 miscarriages and going through medicated cycles - it needs me to be in my home office while I'm on a travel project and frequent doctor appointments. It is unfortunately not a black and white journey where I can say with certainty how and when things will come to a conclusion.

I'm on a work visa so switching jobs is not an option for me and I can't afford to lose my job either.

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I shared details with one manager which we worked out ourselves. I got promoted and suddenly I had 3-4 different partners asking me to travel for engagements. I ended up going through a formal HR travel restriction so I could be covered, because I felt saying "no, I have a medical restriction" wasn't always enough.

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For the one manager, that we were going through fertility treatment. He was aware of my history of miscarriage as well.
For HR, they knew anyway because it required my doctor to fill out paperwork.
For everyone else, I literally said "for health reasons"

I have someone on my team going through it. She has done about 6 cycles so far and still nothing. I am open with her that she can tell me what she wants to tell me. We have a stressful work environment so when she does let me know what she’s got going on I try to encourage her to take the time she needs and I plan around it. Not always ideal timing but it is what it is. If you have a manager with human feelings, I would talk to him/her.

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I had a change of manger mid IVF cycle. 3 times in one year. First manager I was not specific as to what my medical condition was but he knew it was serious and he was supportive. Second manager was the interim manager and department head so I didn’t feel comfortable disclosing anything to him. Third manager I did disclose specifically what I was dealing with for a number of reasons but mainly because I thought she’d have my back more if she knew what it was I was struggling with. I’ve asked for little to no accommodation aside from flexibility with doc appointments and some remote work days during treatments. We will see if I made the right choice in time

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I didn't share anything. But I work remotely, so I had no need to tell them. I had one miscarriage last Xmas. No luck since then 😢

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Yeah it sucks especially more during the holidays. Hopefully we both get good luck soon❤️

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I’ve been going through this journey for about 2.5 years. I told my last manager at my previous company and she didn’t have a single care in the world. Eventually I was let go for other reasons but it was fine because I miserable. In my current job I told one manager, she understood but she left the company. I got a new manager who is very kind but I’ve decided to not tell her anything other than I’m going through medical things and I need to leave early to take medication but my work gets done. She’s been very respectful thus far. Honestly I’m just not trusting of anyone at work anymore after what I went through at my last job.

Sorry to hear that! I feel uncomfortable sharing this for similar reasons. I'm glad you have someone who understands without questioning. Just wish there was a way to have more open conversations about this without putting our jobs at risk.

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