Is it bad if I don’t attend my bridal shower?

I’m not really into bridal showers and I’ve said this to my bridal party as well. One of my friends declined to be my MoH because she is not cool with one of my other friends in the bridal party.
But she is planning on doing a surprise bridal shower. I don’t feel like attending it plus I’m super swamped trying to get ready for the wedding in 6 weeks.
Will I be wrong to decline it directly or even indirectly?

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Why do people assume every bride wants a bridal shower

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Just MO, but if you let it happen and don't go it will be a sour start for your wedding. Think about everyone who comes expecting to celebrate you. Think about the embarrasment of this friend. I imagine this is part of her making up for declining being in your wedding party. And really, if there is friction with her and another member of the BP, she saved you some serious day of drama.

So either pull her aside and tell her you know and ask her to cancel ( although if it's so close people have bought you gifts....consider that) or suck it up and go. You can spare 2- 3 hrs.
Trust me, it will take less time and emotional strength to go than dealing with the fallout of being a no show.

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Eek sorry it’s such a sticky situation. Is this friend still in the wedding party? Does she know that you know about the surprise?

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i’d be clear and tell your friend that you know about it, but communicate expectations. say you don’t want to open gifts there or do any weird games or anything if you’re not into that. and make it more just a brunch or whatever the situation is in your honor. you can make it whatever you want it to be luckily, but you have to be open with the friend

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It certainly would seem very petty even if you’ve already communicated your wishes to this friend? and are in the “right.” Just go and tell your friend to limit it to two hours and to keep it very simple.

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If you don’t want to go you shouldn’t have it. I don’t want one and would be upset if someone set one up. I’m picky about what goes in my home and don’t want other people picking it out and spending their money on something I won’t like

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