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I’m double vaxxed and boosted but how are we still acting like you’re not just as likely to get Covid from a vaccinated person as from a non-vaccinated person? At this point, any exclusion of non-vaccinated people doesn’t really seem like a safety precaution but more like a statement. Do what you’re comfortable with, but do you really think it’s worth alienating people on such an important and joyous day when the benefit from a risk standpoint is marginal? 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks for this. I changed the website to request people take rapid tests and wear N95s if they travel by train or plane. I wear N95s in court so if anyone thinks that is too extreme, I have very little sympathy. They don’t have to come.
Your fiancé needs to tell his sister (and his brother-in-law!) to grow up. She can’t fly alone, really? Sounds like an excuse because she doesn’t want to go without him. That’s a confrontation your fiancé should be able to handle. He can call them out on their selfishness and explain people are high risk. Although she clearly doesn’t care either since she isn’t forcing the vax issue with her husband.
If avoiding confrontation is the priority here, you could get her a rapid test to take and ask her to wear a mask when not eating or drinking (doubt that will go over well) and have a seat for her far away and closest to young healthy people. If you do have elderly/vulnerable guests, I think you should be rapid testing everyone though or asking them to test. All the vaxxed guests when put together probably also pose a significant risk of spreading Covid (maybe more than 1 vaxxed).
I agree. Very frustrating that my FH won’t stand up to SIL. FH didn’t even tell me about this initially and responded in an understanding way to SIL. IMO it’s both SIL and her husband who are somewhat toxic here in that SIL should be able to come on her own. She’s a grown woman. That said, FH and I are aligned that we won’t let this overshadow our day and we will do everything possible to exclude him from spaces bc that’s what is fair for our vulnerable guests.
We will ask people to test beforehand as well but we have, from the beginning, indicated that we are requiring vaccination. Relaxing the rule is not fair to our many family members and friends who have made many sacrifices and who are relying on this rule in their decision to be part of our day and attend our wedding.
Some separate issues here.
I’m very pro-vaccination but your vax-only policy can only cover your wedding events.
Your fiancé’s sister is allowed to travel with her spouse to the wedding and stay with him because it’s a free country and she’s allowed to do what wants. And you and your parents will undoubtedly encounter other unvaccinated people during your travels and in the hotel as well.
I think you are within your rights to politely request that he try to stay away from other wedding guests while he’s in the hotel, because they might assume he’s been vaccinated. And to politely remind your future sister-in-law that her husband cannot attend any of the wedding events in no uncertain terms (in case you’re worried that she’s going to sneak him in).
Remember to be kind when explaining your concerns, but still firm. You’re more likely to get compliance if you’re nice and explain yourself without judging him. And you also have a lifetime ahead of you of interacting with them.
I don’t know you or your sister-in-law or your situation, so I can’t comment on their selfishness. It could very well be the case that they’re acting selfishly. It’s also true that some people don’t like traveling alone. Again I don’t know whether that’s true or not.
I fully support you laying now appropriate boundaries for the things that you do control, i.e. the wedding events. Other non-event things are going to be outside your control.
The most important thing is not to let this thing overshadow your enjoyment of your big day.
Make sure you talk through contingencies with your fiancé and agree on a plan of action beforehand for potential occurrences, like your SIL’s husband crashing the wedding. Then assign someone who will take of that plan on the day of, should it be required (Hopefully not).
You should ask all guests to take a test within 48 hours and recommend them masking up with an N95 or KN95 during travel to the event
How are you going to make sure everyone has been boosted in the past month or two?
We are asking unvaxxed guests (only a handful) to PCR test beforehand and text me, the bride, the results - we also are seating them far from people we know are super COVID conscious
And by beforehand I mean within 48 hours of the event Saturday