Why do people feel the need to gatekeep so aggressively during a casual coffee chat? I reached out to an alumni for an informational interview to learn about their path, and they turned it into an impromptu, zero-notice technical grilling. Ten minutes in, he stopped talking about his career and asked me to walk him through a bunch of technical stuff. I fumbled because I wasn't in interview mode, and now I feel like I blew a connection I hadn't even built yet.

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That’s really unfair for a casual coffee chat. If someone wants to assess technical skills, they should be clear upfront so you can prepare and treat it like an interview. I wouldn’t assume you blew the connection, though. That says more about his approach than your ability.

Sounds like a piece of work

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