If you need an ark…
I No-ah guy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
My brother in law was addicted to the hokey pokey
It was a rough couple of years, but he turned himself around
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
The Blue Crab Bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon t…
I'd like to have kids one day..
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that though.
Twenty years from now, kids are gonna think "Baby it's cold outside" is really weird, and we're gonna have to explain that it has to be understood as a product of its time.
You see, …
Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable
Why did the chicken cross the road
I think the Rainforest Cafe takes the whole rainforest theme too far.
This one time I was sitting there eating my chicken tenders and they bulldozed 40% of the restaurant.
Happy Friday everyone!
She jeffin on my bezos and it feel amazon
I’ve been stung! How could that be? 🐝
I just met the saddest German ever… Hans down
What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
How does NASA organise a party?