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CLT is freaking disaster
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Has anyone sold at IQVIA? What’s comp like?
Anyone joining in Capgemini today.
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Any idea on Mckinsey solutions ?
Happy friday ya'll
CLT is freaking disaster
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I was this person in my 20s and still am for the most part :) You don't have to stop being fun or positive to protect your boundaries. Most of my boundaries have been crossed by being asked for unfair favors and me saying yes, or signing up when no one else is to be the nice guy. If this is you, it starts with small steps:
1. Before you volunteer, really ask yourself if you want to. Practice staying quiet or saying you can't and are overcommitted.
2. This is harder when asked to do something directly. Practice saying, "I'd love to help! I've got a million things on my plate, but let me see what I can do..." This will give you time to reflect and make the best decision, and in some cases you can offer 1/2 or 1/4 of the help they were asking for. In others you will practice politely declining. Practice doing this with small things. Notice them. Recognize when you did the hard thing and turned it down.
3. The hardest thing is when someone crosses you in the moment. If you find someone is taking credit, be more proactive about being more vocal about what you are initiating and working on. If you find someone is speaking for you or contradicting you publicly, recognize that you can disagree very politely and with a smile :)
For all of these things, you will find that little by little people actually come to deeply appreciate you and look up to you. It's easy to be nice and to be a doormat. It's easy to just look out for your own interests. But it's hard and takes practice to find the right balance. And people will instinctively value your time and opinions more when they see that you value yourself.
Wishing you all the best. Just focus on little steps and recognize the progress you make along the way. In a few years you'll find you're not quite the same as you used to be, and you'll carry yourself with your head a little higher :)
Yesss! Also, happy to chat IRL. Just message me and we can connect. I also used to be the same way. Now I’m direct, and still smiley.
(I’m in the same boat but wanted to comment this reference)
*beep beep*
Phenomenal reference lolol
People aren’t crossing boundaries and taking advantage because you’re smiling and agreeable. They’re doing it because you’re a 20s M and you’re in a beat-down “pay your dues” business. Insecure people project their insecurity onto others. Consulting Partners are by far the most insecure group of people I’ve ever had the displeasure of being amongst when I took a dip into consulting from industry years ago. The egos on people who do little other than master internal process is both comical and sad. You want my advice? Go get a real job.
Dang, that’s hardcore. And it sounds like you had a shitttttty experience.
My advice? Be less jaded. I came from industry 4 years ago, and this place is way better than that!
Don't lose that trait. I felt the same in my 20s, but I was wrong. Humility and being approachable will become the reason that you build more meaningful professional and personal relationships going forward.
You only need to humbly say no or be vocal enough to express disagreement.
There will often be the challenge of “paying your dues” and building credibility with your leaders, particularly early on in your tenure. At the same time, I agree with the need to protect your time and not being taken advantage of. Learning to navigate this is an art form that you will need tailor to your own style to preserve your personal integrity, your personality, and your boundaries.
One approach I’d recommend is making use of pregnant pauses in your responses, including knowing nods when given an ask to signify thought and reflection before responding. This gives you time to think about what you want to say, think about the appropriate redirection of the ask if needed, and gives the other side an unconscious indicator that you are busy and are thinking about the other priorities that might conflict with the request. Silence also adds a bit of discomfort to the other side without being rude, which also has a benefit of balancing, (slightly), what can sometimes be a lopsided power dynamic. Good luck!
Chief
You can smile while saying no.
Chief
Teach me how to smile. 30sm with rbf
My 2¢
Listen first, speak last.
When you do speak, be succinct and speak in layman’s terms.
Use intonation when you speak, hand motions, when not overly expressive can be effective as well.
Leave out “Uh” and “like” as much as possible.
Reality is that we are fun and the heart of the party
Rising Star
Go to business school.
Don’t stop smiling! That will come with time after you’re beat down with successive years of bullshit
F